Preferred Pronouns

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How many folks on here have actually been chastised for not knowing someone’s gender identity upon first meeting them? Like, in real life, not something you saw on the internet? An actual moment in which you were polite and courteous and accidentally misgendered someone, and then were scolded by that person for making the wrong assumption.

In my experience (and I work with a number of people who identify as trans) this just doesn’t happen.

Me, a couple days ago. Wasn’t really scolded but did get corrected. No biggie.
 
How many folks on here have actually been chastised for not knowing someone’s gender identity upon first meeting them? Like, in real life, not something you saw on the internet? An actual moment in which you were polite and courteous and accidentally misgendered someone, and then were scolded by that person for making the wrong assumption.

In my experience (and I work with a number of people who identify as trans) this just doesn’t happen.
On this, and all the other diversity issues, I have never once been chastised when I was showing up with empathy and basic human decency. I just don't get why second degree snowflakes (folks who are snowflakes about others being snowflakes) get so pissed off about this.
 
Skimmed through the responses. Actually find this thread to be a good sign. I see very few, if any, responses that show a desire to intentionally offend others. Most seem to have a desire to treat others with respect, dignity and autonomy, while not signally their virtue by ignoring obvious societal norms to placate a tiny minority of people that desire to be offended.

This would align with what I have observed in the real world, not just HT world.
 
This actually fits the thread perfectly. I would be offended if you referred to me as a Democrat or Republican. My politics are non-binary.
Although I am not offended when my position on a given subject is "pigeonholed" as a "R" or "D" response, as it is commonplace among those older than I.

But I am not alone, as over half of the "Z" generation does not vote on an issue based upon whether or not it is supported or introduced by a 'R' or "D' but whether we think it is in the best interest of the country.

:)

Recently, a young woman went off on some poor young man in a coffee shop for addressing her wrong and I said to my friend, "what a bitch". My friend said you obviously was not listening, she prefers 'bastard" ;)
 
It is possible to treat individuals with respect and dignity without affirming practices that are nonsensical in origin and actually demeaning. Words have meaning.

If someone chooses to base their identity on sexual preferences or whatever they think defines them, I will treat them with dignity and respect. However, I will also (respectfully) decline to participate in language that is intended to clearly imply that I affirm behavior/identity outside the parameters of biological reality and God’s moral laws.

What people choose to do privately has very limited affect on me personally. However, a demand/request/expectation that I use language that has the clear implication that my usage of it publicly affirms nonsense or immorality is not something I choose to do.

There are all kinds of examples of where society has no problems with giving clear communication that certain identity scenarios are unacceptable. If I choose to identify as a multi-millionaire and expect a bank to affirm “my reality” without the financial resources to back my claims, I can expect rejection.

If I remove all parameters around how I choose to behave as a self-identified heterosexual man, I can expect divorce or legal consequences dependent on the choices I make.

Just because certain beliefs or behaviors are currently trendy doesn’t mean they should be affirmed or promoted.

In fact, I would hope that if I ever engage in financial fantasy or move towards heterosexual infidelity that people who love me would firmly and clearly articulate that those chosen behaviors/identity are going to devastate me and the people who depend on me.
 
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It is possible to treat individuals with respect and dignity without affirming practices that are nonsensical in origin and actually demeaning. Words have meaning.

If someone chooses to base their identity on sexual preferences or whatever they think defines them, I will treat them with dignity and respect. However, I will also (respectfully) decline to participate in language that is intended to clearly imply that I affirm behavior/identity outside the parameters of biological reality and God’s moral laws.

What people choose to do privately had very limited affect on me personally. However, a demand/request/expectation that I use language that has the clear implication that my usage of it publicly affirms nonsense or immorality is not something I choose to do.

There are all kinds of examples of where society has no problems with giving clear communication that certain identity scenarios are unacceptable. If I choose to identify as a multi-millionaire and expect a bank to affirm that “my reality” without the financial resources to back my claims, I can expect rejection.

If I remove all parameters around how I choose to behave as a self-identified heterosexual man, I can expect divorce or legal consequences dependent on the choices I make.

Just because certain beliefs or behaviors are currently trendy doesn’t mean they should be affirmed or promoted.

In fact, I would hope that if I ever engage in financial fantasy or move towards heterosexual infidelity that people who love me would firmly and clearly articulate that those chosen behaviors/identity are going to devastate me and the people who depend on me.
Totally disagree. America is the land of the free, you can call yourself anything you want.
 
How many folks on here have actually been chastised for not knowing someone’s gender identity upon first meeting them? Like, in real life, not something you saw on the internet? An actual moment in which you were polite and courteous and accidentally misgendered someone, and then were scolded by that person for making the wrong assumption.

In my experience (and I work with a number of people who identify as trans) this just doesn’t happen.

I live in the in the Bay Area, my friends cover all the progressive tech companies. I have friends that are LGBTQ, I've gone to drag shows in San Francisco....I concur with this statement.

That said, my wife had a patient once who refused to provide their gender at birth. After a detailed explanation of the cardiac and obesity risks related to treating hormones the patient acknowledged, then ignored the potential risks and went to another doctor.
 
Totally disagree. America is the land of the free, you can call yourself anything you want.


Sure can. Expecting/requiring others to call you that can be problematic.

I gave H.R. notice that my chosen pronoun is “Master”. There seems to be significant resistance to accepting my preference among persons of color within our company. Shouldn’t they be fired for not respecting my wishes?
 
I don't think he is saying you cant. He is just saying he is not going to align with their choice.
Its just always been interesting to me how intolerant, allegedly tolerant people come across...in particular in the U.S. which prides itself on freedom.

I never have been able to wrap my mind around that...probably why I avoid organized religion like the plague.
 
Sure can. Expecting/requiring others to call you that can be problematic.

I gave H.R. notice that my chosen pronoun is “Master”. There seems to be significant resistance to accepting my preference among persons of color within our company. Shouldn’t they be fired for not respecting my wishes?

Did you spell it M-A-S-T-E-R, G with a Double E?
 
Its just always been interesting to me how intolerant, allegedly tolerant people come across...in particular in the U.S. which prides itself on freedom.

I never have been able to wrap my mind around that...probably why I avoid organized religion like the plague.
Says the one that assumes other HTalkers preferred pronouns. 🤡
 
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