Hunt Talk Radio - Look for it on your favorite Podcast platform

Handy Skills You Do and Don't Possess

I make the best pulled pork North of the 46th Parallel, and I can fall asleep on the couch like nobody's business.
 
I can whip up some pretty complicated GAAP financial statements! Fair value measurements, consolidations, other comprehensive income, regulatory assets, ERISA, defined benefit pensions, you name it!

That's hot.

I can put together the Income tax line on GAAP financial statements, forecast global tax expense under the annualization and FIN18 methodologies, account for partnership flip structures, understand HLBV, calculate R&D and ITC tax credits and am learning about the possessory interest regimes local tax assessors are using to find new sources of revenue.

While that might get me all the ladies, some of my more functional qualities are reloading, cooking, canning, gardening, memorizing maps, investing in wine, and becoming an amateur conservationist.

I wish I knew how to tie knots. When I was on a pack hunt in Canada I was memorized by the efficiency our guide/wrangler displayed loading and securing our horses. Every day I watched them trying to learn and possibly replicate what they were doing, but there was no way. If they were eaten by a bear while we were out there I would have been screwed.

 
All I know is that if I get first move and hit the corner and you don't hit the center on your first move I win. If you get first move and go for the corner and I hit the center my first move then the cat gets it.

A fellow master!

I bait my nieces into plating by offering them $20 if they can beat me.
 
I can turn a pile of malted barley, hops, water, and yeast into award winning ales and lagers - probably my best social skill. My bow staff skills suck, but I can turn a live tree into a graceful piece of bent wood that'll propel arrows through the air.

Downfall: I'm white and therefore possess a genetic disease that prevents me from dancing. And sadly, I can navigate government bureaucracy.
 
I'm also a failure at knot tying. I've even resorted to taking pictures of knots and watching Youtube videos on how to tie them and still struggling.

My dad used to tie a knot that you could pull on to make it tight for securing a load and I can never seem to figure out how to accomplish that.
 
Luckily able to do anything mechanical having grown up with a dad who could fix anything and everything.


To this day still clueless when it comes to algebra/trig. Abhor dancing and still cannot change a dirty diaper without gagging.
 
You bunch of non-dancing fools. I did the worm at my daughters 13th birthday party and all the kids at her school still talk about it. Next week is sweet 16 so I plan to do it again.
 
I'm pretty good at trouble-shooting about anything... from mechanical issues to why a river floods. And can usually figure out how to fix the problem, or will at least try my hand at it. My philosophy... if someone else can do it, so can I.

I feel like I have about a 4th degree black belt in animal killing. Fur, feather and fin... I can usually sniff them out and make them my dinner.

I would say my one downfall is not finishing what I start. I'll take it to 98% and say screw it, good enough.
 
I can usually shoot the head off a grouse with a shotgun without getting too many pellets in the breastmeat, if it's standing still. I can't fix anything without a tantrum. I curse exquisitely, IMHO.
 
I can lead technical rock, alpine, and water ice, hike 50 miles in a day, draw up a backpack trip with my eyes closed, raise farm animals, and do good science. I know more about vastly different kinds of music than most, Wu-Tang to Soundgarden to George Strait.

I'm not great with cars, paperwork, or getting my dog to do anything other than what it wants to.
 
I have zero patience (unless I'm alone in the woods), I drink too much, struggle to focus at work, live by the phrase "good enough", and can't fix a bent paper clip. But I tell good stories, try to be a great friend, and have most of places one would ever want to hunt or fish memorized in Google Earth.
 
I can do math pretty well and I am super happy with my shot gunning skills....well except for this one wood duck last year that made me look like a fool. I am pretty much incapable when it comes to any of the fine arts though. Never reloaded and never fly fished. I can catch muskies okay. Mechanically I am okay but there are many who are better.

But the most important skill I have? I think I I am pretty good at being a dad and husband :hump:
 
I can wreck on my mountain bike as well as anyone else can.

I may call BS on that one.... i can wreck better than most.
I can fix and trouble shoot almost anything, and build things out of metal. I have worked as an auto mechanic, cycle mechanic, machinist, tool grinder, experimental mechanic, and technical specialist for companies including GM and Harley. I can't spell good, swear too much, and have a hard time relaxing. A good back country hunt is the only thing that relaxes me long term. I worry too much about things I can't control. They have this new label called ADD That was not around when I was a kid. I am the poster child so if we are together and you are wondering if I am listening, make sure I am looking at you while you're talking otherwise I am thinking about women, bikes, or hunting.
 
Last edited:
I'm pretty good with knots and rigging being a lineman by trade. I'm also pretty good at getting stuck vehicles not to be stuck because I'm pretty lousy at picking a good line or judging how firm the ground is. I'm really good at forgetting how old I actually am. I can fix old stuff, but new stuff has me scratching my head. I'm horrible at saying no which makes me constantly short on time for myself.
 
I built my house from the ground up, by myself, so I can do everything required for that. I also build longbows and bamboo fly rods although I have to be in the right mood to do either one of those. I tie flies and have just started reloading my own ammo after getting sick of not being able to find what I want when I want it.
Being poor most of my life turned into a real blessing because when there isn't money to pay someone to fix something you learn to fix it... or go without.

Vehicles are one of the few things I can only do basic repairs on. Engines have just gotten to complicated for me to keep up.

Patrick
 
I've always had a knack for finding things. It infuriates my friends and family. While we're hunting or hiking they'll walk over something and I'll reach down and pick up an arrowhead, or a dinosaur tooth. If there's a shed anywhere in the vicinity or pretty much any artifact I'll have it picked up before they even know what I'm doing.

When it comes to electricity I might as well be looking at a book written in a dead language.
 
I built a pretty sharp looking 800 foot ranch fence around my place but it took me 1.5 years.
I can tell jokes around a campfire all night - or until someone tells me to shut up.
After 5 years of backcountry grizzly research, I might be the best person I know when it comes to hanging food.
I've been ice fishing maybe 20 times and not until the last time I went had I ever pulled a fish through the ice.
I'm a pretty good husband too.
 
Dang, I've got nothing to add to the list of talents provided herein. Bullshitting is probably my "default" skill when all else seems to fail.

My tools consist of a screwdriver, a channel lock, and a hammer. If it can't be fixed with those tools, it is broken beyond what I have patience to fix. Call someone.

I come from a family of very talented machinist, mechanics, and craftsmen. I completely reject that role as a husband or father, as it imposes heavily on the more important "family times" spent hunting and fishing. If God meant for me to be handy or to mow lawns, he would not have invented the Yellow Pages.

I feel completely smug when I drive to the lake or to the trailhead and see some guy mowing a lawn, repairing a roof, or some other domestic chore imposed upon him as a result of proclaiming how "handy" he is. Dumb ass. If you want to hunt and fish, you never tell anyone of your "handiness;" not your wife, your mom, your neighbor. To get enough hunting and fishing in the busy life of today's world, you need to feign complete incompetence when it comes to such things. And, that time at the lake or in camp is the real "family time" we are all seeking.

When asked to work on a "honey-do," immediately start cussing. Act like it's the end of the world. When pressed to the point that you have no choice, make a lot of noise. Cut the back of your hand on a sharp edge. Bleeds like hell and the person imposing this task on you will have to look at it every day. Break a few things. Stomp out the door stating you have to go to town to get some more parts. Use it as a trip to DQ. Make sure you buy your tools and parts at a farm and ranch store that sells ammo. Buying ammo at this time is a good way to float it under the radar and not get in too much trouble.

Come home smiling like you are now Bob Villa and ready to tackle the project. Bang around a bit, cuss a bit more, and then wrap it up in a manner that leaves a few parts still in your pocket. Bring her in for the big test run. It will not work any better than when the imposition was made on your family time (hunting/fishing time), but now you can say you tried. After a few bouts of this, such impositions will no longer be made on your "family time" and you will get to laugh at others on your way to the lake or to the trailhead.

I've been in a few serious jams where I had to employ my handiness, but I swore camera guys to secrecy. My brother has seen me work through problems in a moment of extreme mechanical need, but he knows if he tells my wife I am able to fix things, he will be on my short list.

A man should take pride in the fact that his wife is a better mechanic and carpenter than he is. It shows you have not allowed "details" too impose on your family time at the lake or in deer camp. A true family man has such priorities. Hopefully she owns more tools than you. Some women do actually like to fix things, which is why they marry men who are good at breaking things. Mostly they want you to be a good "family man," which requires a lot of "family time."

I can trap critters pretty good. Give me a sharp knife and a cutting table and I will have your fish or game into fine edible portions, in short order. My best skill has been BSing a marvelous woman that she is well served by staying married to me in spite of my many faults and few talents. By far my greatest skill of adulthood.
 
Big Fin- That is pure inspiration. I fully plan on changing how I deal with my domestic duties. You, sir, are a very wise man.
 
Leupold BX-4 Rangefinding Binoculars

Latest posts

Forum statistics

Threads
110,813
Messages
1,935,396
Members
34,888
Latest member
Jack the bear
Back
Top