Stress relief suggestions

[NR_Hunter]

Lots of good advice in here really. I think you should be proud of yourself for really thinking hard about things and how you can de stress in healthy ways. My dad was a city administrator that had to eat all sorts of shit sandwiches at city council meetings and us kids had to bear the brunt of the stress that put on him at times. I love my dad but he def did not deal with work stress very well growing up at times.

Nobody is gonna say it, but talking to a therapist once or twice a month might help. Could be a helpful way to learn some new tools so you don’t feel you’re white knuckling it all the time from stress.

 

[Treeshark]

I’ve found that writing down specific bullet points on paper is helpful.

Getting it out of my head and on paper helps me feel like I don’t have to sit and try to remember it all day and night.

 

[Ben Lamb]

Sorry to hear that. Lots of tried and true things like exercise, getting outside, hot shower, etc.

But one that I notice in me, is to stay off the Internet. Both before, when the appropriate anxiety or stress your body is producing in preparation of what’s coming is being felt, but especially after, when maybe you feel relief but are still yet stressed. There’s just something about the screens that can stress a guy out, even though it feels like detaching from the stress through them.

This. After the 20 election, I deleted a bunch of social media, and started limiting my time online. The elimination of the negative stressors was hugely helpful for my mental health and it helps bring a better clarity of thought, quite frankly. It made me significantly happier when I would spend 6 -12 hours doing something other than being in front of a screen.

Liquor amped my stress as I'd get angrier stewing in my juices and a triple bourbon. If you rock a screen all day, make sure you don't doom scroll at night, and just get away from all of it - TV, phones, laptops, tablets, etc.

Public meetings tend to bring out the worst in people as well. Gallows humor can help cope with that.

Barring all that, may I suggest this?

 

[NR_Hunter]

Man you gotta step into every presentation with this Bernie Sanders mentality of not being afraid of these MFs. Don’t be scared of those pussies in the audience trying hit you with cheap shots.

 

[Addicting]

@JohnCushman can verify this method.

 

[WildWill]

It's 2025 and not one person has recommended the sticky icky.

 

[Sask hunter]

I like to shoot my bow

 

[noharleyyet]

Regular exercise...

 

[Nick87]

As a extremely high strung, anxious individual I appreciate this thread.

 

[elkduds]

Here are the foundations of self calming, per my work with anxiety, panic and post trauma patients.

Anxiety feels like a response to external stressors, with the implied inaccurate belief that one can only relieve anxiety by solving the conflict. Brains have a subconscious alarm system, the amygdala. It tells the body when to release adrenaline into the blood stream. Adrenaline response evolved to help escape existential threats, fight or flight. It doesn't differentiate between falling off a cliff and interpersonal conflicts. Muscle tension, rapid, shallow breathing, eye dilation and circulatory disturbances, while useful in fighting or fleeing, are problematic in most modern stressors, including relational conflict. Learning to monitor one's adrenaline/arousal and deliberately reduce it when unneeded is tremendously useful.

Adrenaline breathing, rapid and shallow, does not purge CO2 fully from lungs, and reduces intake of O2. Feeling difficulty breathing stimulates the adrenaline feedback loop, so brain releases more adrenaline. This is the etiology of panic attacks, basically adrenaline storms.

Slow, deep breathing with complete emptying of lungs while exhaling is a strong antidote to adrenaline overload. There are many online resources to guide this process. It takes regular practice to become fully effective. Practicing calming breathing for 2 min. intervals, 10-15 times per day over 2 weeks will teach your brain and body to turn down the adrenaline valve. This practice works best when relatively calm, to focus on the internal process. Once learned, this breathing will be effective quickly against excess adrenaline. Using breathing as a relief only when anxious is far less effective than practicing/learning over time to be well armed when major stress/anxiety takes over. One reason exercise is effective for stress is it facilitates full breathing.

Another basic self-calming skill is grounding, I'll post on that later.

 

[Hilljackoutlaw]

Honestly Dave Chappelle and Shane Gillis clips helped. With a little south park thrown in for good measure

Is irrelevant gonna have to choke a bitch!?

 

[Irrelevant]

Is irrelevant gonna have to choke a bitch!?

#*^@#* your couch n***a!

 

[Irrelevant]

Thanks guys. Just talking about it helps.

The answer... is that there is no answer, but simply a long laundry list of things that help.
-I do need to brush up on more research to be able to provide better rebuttals.
-I am going to actually reduce the amount of data presented and shift the focus more to risk.
-I do need to, as someone said, grow up and stop internalizing conflict.
-Keep exercising
-And try to meditate

 

[44hunter45]

So my office is currently embattled in a local development dispute. We represent a water district looking to protect drinking water quality. I'm the one that gets to present at all the public meetings. I just did my first tonight. It was very stressful. I'm all kinds of wound up. I'm already one large glass of wine in, without any hope of sleep on the horizon. Any suggestions?

Is this local? Meaning are you in a hotel? Reads that way, but not clear. I can never sleep in hotels, even on leisure trips.

My job has me pitching to C level execs when there is an outage. I find the only answer for me is to go through the material until I completely own it. The first one is always rough, after that you get a feel for the possible questions and emotion levels. Good execs (or Commissioners) want the facts and not the spin. I refuse to buy in when I'm asked to spin anything. That hurts you in the long run.

 

[Hem]

Crank this and pump some iron.

 

[gouch]

There are very few things that stress me out. For the most part I'm a go with the flow kind a person.

But public speaking? Nope, just won't do it. If I were put in the position you are in, I would be curled up on the floor in the fetal position sucking my thumb.

Probably not much help, just a little understanding.

 

[Hilljackoutlaw]

I do need to, as someone said, grow up and stop internalizing conflict

I find this one to be the most difficult. Sometimes there is so many layers to the conflict its hard to just deal with it without creating another conflict.

 

[noharleyyet]

buy a guitar...

 

[geetar]

Regular exercise...

If I don't get at least a short run in several days a week I don't even like myself. I'm sure others feel the same about me. No I'm not a Cam Hanes fan boy I do it for the sanity not the attention.

 

[Ben Lamb]

Thanks guys. Just talking about it helps.

The answer... is that there is no answer, but simply a long laundry list of things that help.
-I do need to brush up on more research to be able to provide better rebuttals.
-I am going to actually reduce the amount of data presented and shift the focus more to risk.
-I do need to, as someone said, grow up and stop internalizing conflict.
-Keep exercising
-And try to meditate

This is all good.

As someone who does presentations, etc I find a lot of my confidence comes from the research and understanding of the issue at hand. I've also learned that not responding can also be a very useful tool. Especially if the person a ginormous cockwomble.

Presentations that are data dense are awesome for professionals and people with more than a passing understanding of an issue, but not for the general public. It makes people feel like they're missing something because it's not simple and clear, or that they're being talked down too (which is the opposite of what a detailed presentation is). That sucks for actual knowledge but it does present an opportunity to expand when the audience engages.

Also, Limp Bisquick only induces stress and stupid soul patches. Go darker, meaner. Go Type O Negative.