I drove back to the park, and went into the men's room. Searching the toilet stall, looking into the trashcan, and searching the park's other trash cans (hoping that a finders keepers person might take the cash and gift card, but not want to try the credit cards) to find no wallet anywhere.
I went back to the car, and pulled everything out of it. While I was doing this, I drained the icemelt from the coolers, and guzzled some more water. My head was feeling some sort of way. And oh, yeah, you've got a patient back in Wichita that is texting, calling you, and later I found out she is calling the pharmacy as well.
I texted the family group text: "I can't find my wallet.....PRAY PRAY PRAY!"
Failing in my first attempt at locating the wallet after emptying the contents of the front and back seats, I decided that my next step had to be getting the app to work for the pain meds for the patient.
Driving back to Manhattan, I found a empty church parking lot that had enough bars to allow me to initiate and connect to the app. Such a #$%^))Q hassle to input all of the required patient info, find a pharmacy on a rarely used app that isn't particularly intuitive, and my brain is all fuzzed out by the wallet debacle unfolding. Finally pushing send, now the two factor authentication process starts. The app texts back a 6 digit code, which allows the next step to start.
I now have 3 minutes to log in to an authentication app (separate from the RX app), which requires a non memorized user name/password, and then requires a random number generator that rolls over with a new number every 30 seconds to prove that I am who I say I am, and that yes, indeed, please dispense some narcotic pills to this fine, fine lady.
I learn something about this whole process today....two factor authentication on a cell phone requires a second device to allow for two factor ID. And my iPad is hotspotting to my iPhone, and thus doesn't allow for DEA happiness. Revving my engine in frustration, I continue to drive into Manhattan to do siphon off some Wi-Fi from McDonalds so that the iPad is connected without the iPhone.
I think I've got it, and then something is not accepted. I try again. Double check my password. Discover that the 6 digit randomized 30 second life span key has three numbers, a space, and then three more numbers. Wallet missing foggy brain didn't catch that at first.
Wait, my phone is ringing. WalMart pharmacy. Bob the pharmacist is calling me, because my patient is calling them every five minutes asking if they have the RX. I explain to Bob how my day is going, and I tell him that I'm about ready to throw my phone out of the window in disgust of the app. He comes to a partial rescue, as he suggests that I could voice authorize a lower schedule narcotic, bypassing the *&#^% two factor ID that was getting the best of me. Finally rid of my responsibility to my patient, I can once again try to figure out where my wallet could be.
Driving out of Manhattan and back to the city park, I hope that perhaps I've overlooked a sneaky hiding place and decide to dismantle the car once again. Finding a bit of shade, everything goes out. Flashlight search commences. Still nothing. Brain fog not lifting, but getting heavier.
Think kansasdad THINK!!
Maybe a drive to clear my thinking and cool myself off after reloading the car for the second time today. Driving along the north east side of the fort, I leave the highway and drive some gravel roads. Phone rings, and once again its the pharmacist so I pull over. The antibiotic chosen could interact with some heart meds. Secondary options discussed and authorized. I once again text the patient to review renewed instructions.
My phone rings again, this time it is Mrs kansasdad, wanting to encourage me that she knows this wallet will be found. She asks questions that get me talking. Getting dressed, tromping through the woods, setting up and moving ambush spots, sneaking along the woods, seeing the big log that offered a nice seat to sit and check OnX, and PULLING THE CABLE AND BATTERY OUT OF MY POCKET!! The pocket that has my wallet in it.
A wave of relief ran over me. Brain fog lifting. I know what I did, and what I need to do. Now all I have to do is to retrace my steps as best I can just in case the battery/cable withdrawal isn't laying next to the log, and go find that valuable piece of leather and plastic.
I go straight to the creek crossing, glide through the woods, once again finding treestand hunters in almost the same position as this morning, move past the elk beds, swing around and slow down, looking for the big log. Finding the log, I walk along just as I did the first time, and come to the other side.
Thar she be!! The BEST EVER "As they lay" item in my life.
As I was fully geared up for hunting, and leaving would once again have me nearly walking underneath the treestand hunters, I stuck it out until the end of legal shooting light, neither hearing or seeing any elk. The deer blowing at the hunters to my south was amazingly persistent. But I only had thoughts of how I was going to send meme after meme to the family group chat once I got back to cell service.
