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Colors and Your Sex Life

The Viperess

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Colors and Your Sex Life
"The Key To Your Sexual Life"

The clothes you wear, your home furnishings and the car you drive all give clues to your sexual personality. The key is the colors you select for your possessions. Most people claim they haven't a favorite color. But look around you, and you'll notice a pattern, especially in your clothing and home decor. The predominant color for you is the one that appears most frequently - it's the one that mirrors the sexual you. A panel of psychologists, speaking at the 1975 Home Interior Design Forum, explained the association between color and sexual patterns.

RED: People who like red tend to be tigers in the sack. They are easily aroused and enjoy sex in every way imaginable. Once the sexual spark is ignited, it may take hours to extinguish. When two reds get together, in (oops, that should be "the") ensuing erotica could make Lady Chatterly blush. Lovers of red tend to be aggressors and weaker colors should be aware.

YELLOW: If you tend to favor yellow, your sexual drives are complex and turn toward the adaptable. The favorite color of homosexuals is yellow. But don't panic - not everyone who wears yellow is queer. In most cases the person will consent to the stronger partner's desires in a passive manner. You will never enjoy sex to the fullest, but you will never turn down an invitation from somebody you enjoy and admire.

PINK: Persons who like pink show a reluctance to mature in sexual matters: women tend to tease, to promise more than they intend to deliver. In some cases they flaunt their femininity - but because they secretly hate men. A great percentage of prostitutes boast entire wardrobes in pink. Men who like pink are the philanderers and flirts. They are the type who will make three dates for the same evening and not keep one, preferring to pick up a dish in some bar instead. Women whose husbands like pink should keep a secret nest egg.

PURPLE: Lovers of purple frequently consider themselves to be too sophisticated for a fun romp in the sack. Women sometimes are the type who hat e to mess their hair. Men are business-like in their approach to lovemaking. In both sexes, purple partners are more concerned with their fulfillment than anyone else's gratification.

BLACK: Black color preferences point to black sex (not necessarily meaning black partners). These people are the misfits of the sex world and seek out each other in kinship. They tend to prefer perverted sex and are usually masochistic or sadist in nature. They are moody people and often perform at there peak when under stress or during unhappy times. Police psychiatrists claim that sex offenders prefer the color black. And it is no coincidence that the uniform of monsters and teenage gangs is black attire.

GREEN: Those who prefer green are fresh and innocent in their approach to sex. Women who love green will always make love like virgins all their life. And a man may always be a trifle clumsy and awkward but in a charming and endearing sort of way. Green lovers are gentle, but not passionate. If chosen as a mate, one will never need worry about infidelity.

ORANGE: Lovers of the color orange lean toward sexual fantasies. The sex act is regarded as a dramatic one-act play in which they are the star. Foreplay is as important as the act of love. They whisper sweet nothings, meaningless dialog; they feel it is their image. Orange people often do not experience orgasm - but they put on a darn good act. Men tend to pull their partner's hair, and women leave red welts on the sex partners back.

BROWN: If you love brown, you're a real treasure for the right mate. Brown lovers tend to be warm and deep, sensitive to the needs and desires of their partners. Sex is a 24 hour a day thing. Where you can't say "I love you " often enough. Snuggling by the fire, walking in the rain or catching snowflakes on their tongue is a turn on to a lover of brown. They need lots of time and privacy to make love. But their emotions are such that one harsh word could end the affair.

GRAY: The color gray, a preferred color by people who are indecisive. They can't get excited about anything - including color - so they choose a noncommittal shade. Men who prefer gray look at sex as a way of relieving tension, but nothing more, nothing less. It's wham, bam, thank you ma'am. Women don't make love, they have intercourse. And for one of two reasons only: to accommodate their mate, or to become pregnant. They count the cracks in the bedroom plaster until the sex act is over with and done. But when teamed with another color, the gray spouse considers the other's infidelity a blessing. When gray marries another gray, the marriage is made in heaven.

BLUE: Lovers of blue are wonderful sex partners. They are sinners, affectionate and sensitive to their partners need. They consider love making a fine art and their approach is elegant. Men who love blue are like concert pianists, delicately ravaging their partner like they would play a baby grand. Women in the blue category enjoy sex to the fullest. They are exciting partners but their passion may be compared to a tidal wave rather than fiery aggression. Both women and men enjoy foreplay and the aftermath of lovemaking, as much as the sex act itself. In marriage a blue person is a wonderful mate - never seeking outside interests.

WHITE: If a person is infatuated with white, sex often seems filthy. These people are puritanical in nature. French kissing is obscene and to make love in the daylight is unheard of. Women who love white will undress beneath the covers. Men will shower before and after the sex act. These people still use pet names for their genitals.

THE END

What color are you
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I have a Brown sofa and chairs, two Brown desks, a Brown printer/ scanner stand, a Brown book case, Brown carpet, Brown Chest of drawers, Brown wallet, Brown stocks on seven of my hunting weapons, Brown boots, and a Brown truck!!!

HHHMMMMMMMM....... What does THAT say?
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<FONT COLOR="#800080" SIZE="1">[ 01-13-2004 13:40: Message edited by: Gunner46 ]</font>
 
Oh Yeah!

I have an Orange vest, Orange gloves, Orange coat, and Orange underwear!
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<FONT COLOR="#800080" SIZE="1">[ 01-14-2004 12:24: Message edited by: Gunner46 ]</font>
 
OK, so where is Mossy Oak
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lets see, sensitive to desires of partner (does 2 minutes count as sensitive
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)(brown), clumsy but gentle after a long day of hunting (green), relieving tension after a long day of hunting (gray), performing best under stress trying to beat sunrise before a long day of hunting (black), and having fantasies about long days of hunting (orange). Yep, that sounds about right. Just don't let the wife know, she will have me figured out then
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Being there was no mention of "camo" I guess I will have to go with blue & white plaid, so I guess that catagorizes me as something of a combination of both traits. As I stated in one of my signatures elsewhere: "...for within each of us lie the divine and the diabolical, the sinner and the saint ..."
 
Keeerist YH; what do you guys do in a "white out"???
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Uh; never mind!
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Well that's just swell.... my wardrobe is full of all of those colors! I wear the color that suits my mood.... imagine that! I love to wear red and black. Now as far as my surounding environment... it is half brown and half black (leopard skin patterns, deer hides, wood furnishishings). I guess I can live with these colors!
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BROWN: If you love brown, you're a real treasure for the right mate. Brown lovers tend to be warm and deep, sensitive to the needs and desires of their partners. Sex is a 24 hour a day thing. Where you can't say "I love you " often enough. Snuggling by the fire, walking in the rain or catching snowflakes on their tongue is a turn on to a lover of brown. They need lots of time and privacy to make love. But their emotions are such that one harsh word could end the affair.


Hmmm I don't know?

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Sex is a 24 hour a day thing. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
OK maybe
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I have a "red" truck and a "white" truck, but i have an Extra large "pink" Penis. Now i don`t know what this all means, but i`m horny all of the time.
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<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> BROWN: If you love brown, you're a real treasure for the right mate. Brown lovers tend to be warm and deep, sensitive to the needs and desires of their partners. Sex is a 24 hour a day thing. Where you can't say "I love you " often enough. Snuggling by the fire, walking in the rain or catching snowflakes on their tongue is a turn on to a lover of brown. They need lots of time and privacy to make love. But their emotions are such that one harsh word could end the affair. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Uhhhhhh.. Does that Sound a bit "GAY" here ?

<BLOCKQUOTE>quote:</font><HR> Brown lovers tend to be warm and deep, sensitive to the needs and desires of their partners. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Do I hear someone Talking about Pushing a Wheel Barrow through the Leather Cherrio if they are a "BROWN" lover ?!?!
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