Christmas presents for wife

[Stocker]

I’m getting my Christmas shopping done early this year, heading to town now.

I just wanted to give a PSA for you young guys who are newly married, or close to getting married. The stages of shopping for your wife/fiancé/girlfriend go like this.

1. You spoil her with nice jewelry you can barley afford. (Here’s a $2,000 necklace I sold a gun to buy)

2. You start getting her nice household items as you move in together. (Here’s a vacuum and some pots and pans)

3. You’re newly married without kids in that honeymoon stage so you go back to getting her nice jewelry/cars/ other expensive things. (We gotta go pick up your new ride at the dealer next week)

4. PAY ATTENTION HERE!!!!

You have kids so it’s all about them, your wife will tell you “we don’t need to exchange gifts, it’s all about the kids”

ITS A TRAP!!!!! The kids will open gifts and at the last second she’ll pull out a couple really thoughtful gifts for you. You’ll stand there like a doofus knowing you have nothing for her, she won’t believe you because she doesn’t believe you are that stupid to actually get her nothing, but she has greatly underestimated your stupidity.

5. You take mental notes of things she brings up she wants over the year, only to forget them and just get her things she uses like perfumes, and other trinkets she’ll never use or wear but you buy anyway because you have no clue what she really wants. (I’m in this stage) (Here’s some perfume that you don’t use because I can’t remember what the bottle looks like, some candles, and some other weird crap. It’s the thought that counts)

Some of you older guys can fill in the rest.

 

[CorkyM]

We’re not exchanging gifts this year, I spent 5K on my teeth. Perhaps a card.

 

[AvidIndoorsman]

5. You take mental notes of things she brings up she wants over the year, only to forget them and just get her things she uses like perfumes, and other trinkets she’ll never use or wear but you buy anyway because you have no clue what she really wants. (I’m in this stage) (Here’s some perfume that you don’t use because I can’t remember what the bottle looks like, some candles, and some other weird crap. It’s the thought that counts)

Some of you older guys can fill in the rest.

So hopefully this all pans out for me, this past year I kept 2 spreadsheets on my phone... stuff I wanted stuff she wants. When either I found myself shopping for gear or she mentioned something I immediately added it to the list.

When thanksgiving rolled around I handed her my list, included website, model number and color, hopefully I getting new SG gaiters, range finder pouch, etc instead of dumb junk. Then I bought every thing on her spreadsheet

Goal was to avoid spending money on things we don't really need or want, and to spend it only on purchase we would have made anyway over the course of the year.

 

[Stocker]

We’re not exchanging gifts this year, I spent 5K on my teeth. Perhaps a card.

You’re screwed, she’ll have a really thoughtful gift for you. It doesn’t have ti be expensive but she will.

 

[Stocker]

So hopefully this all pans out for me, this past year I kept 2 spreadsheets on my phone... stuff I wanted stuff she wants. When either I found myself shopping for gear or she mentioned something I immediately added it to the list.

When thanksgiving rolled around I handed her my list, included website, model number and color, hopefully I getting new SG gaiters, range finder pouch, etc instead of dumb junk. Then I bought every thing on her spreadsheet

Goal was to avoid spending money on things we don't really need or want, and to spend it only on purchase we would have made anyway over the course of the year.

I knew not every husband was as dumb as me.

 

[DouglasR]

1. You spoil her with nice jewelry you can barley afford. (Here’s a $2,000 necklace I sold a gun to buy)

Speaking of social constructs, is there anything dumber than jewelry?

 

[Lilhowie83]

You couldn't be more spot on. I know she has told me a hundred different ideas throughout the year. But here I sit, telling my coworkers I need to get her something, but I don't have a damn clue where to start.

 

[DouglasR]

Speaking of social constructs, is there anything dumber than jewelry?

We could go on vacation or remodel the bathroom...
Or you could have an absolutely worthless piece of metal/rock that is for sale at every other mall in the world.

 

[seeth07]

I’m getting my Christmas shopping done early this year, heading to town now.

You have a funny definition of "early"...

The key to all of this is simply picking up on the ever so tricky subtle hints that are very carefully given throughout the year. When you are just starting in a relationship, they generally aren't very subtle and more or less look more like a demand. She is just training you and as you pass her tests, she will expect better of you going forward each year and the bar will be raised. I'm at about 13 years in myself and there is no doubt that it is full on subtle hints at this point. I know I miss most of them because it eventually gets pointed out how I failed. However, every now and then I score big by picking one up and my strategy is to always not wait until a birthday, anniversary or xmas to present it. Example: just a few weeks ago I spotted her on her phone looking at Minnesota Wild jerseys. I didn't say anything, didn't do anything. I double checked the credit card for a week and never saw a change to anything that would align with a jersey so I timed buying it so it would ship to my house on a day she worked. I took that baby last week and hung it up in her closet with a bow and a note that said "merry christmas, love you". 2 days later when she finally noticed it, I was the best husband ever.

 

[Mountain Man]

I’m getting my Christmas shopping done early this year, heading to town now.

I just wanted to give a PSA for you young guys who are newly married, or close to getting married. The stages of shopping for your wife/fiancé/girlfriend go like this.

1. You spoil her with nice jewelry you can barley afford. (Here’s a $2,000 necklace I sold a gun to buy)

2. You start getting her nice household items as you move in together. (Here’s a vacuum and some pots and pans)

3. You’re newly married without kids in that honeymoon stage so you go back to getting her nice jewelry/cars/ other expensive things. (We gotta go pick up your new ride at the dealer next week)

4. PAY ATTENTION HERE!!!!

You have kids so it’s all about them, your wife will tell you “we don’t need to exchange gifts, it’s all about the kids”

ITS A TRAP!!!!! The kids will open gifts and at the last second she’ll pull out a couple really thoughtful gifts for you. You’ll stand there like a doofus knowing you have nothing for her, she won’t believe you because she doesn’t believe you are that stupid to actually get her nothing, but she has greatly underestimated your stupidity.

5. You take mental notes of things she brings up she wants over the year, only to forget them and just get her things she uses like perfumes, and other trinkets she’ll never use or wear but you buy anyway because you have no clue what she really wants. (I’m in this stage) (Here’s some perfume that you don’t use because I can’t remember what the bottle looks like, some candles, and some other weird crap. It’s the thought that counts)

Some of you older guys can fill in the rest.

This progression is so spot on! I used to be a great gift giver and now I feel like I can barely function. Last Christmas did not go well…I forgot to get my wife a single Stocking gift and didn’t realize it until looking at how disproportionally deflated her stocking was compared to the other 3 on Christmas morning. Sure we were on a ski trip in the Austrian Alps so logistics were a challenge, but to bring zero stocking gifts really hurt her feelings. I got her at least 10 small gifts this year to try and make up for it.

 

[thomas89]

Microwave potato bag cooker was all I caught my wife saying she wanted. Your wish is my command!

Wait, as I type it out this feels like a trap. I feel like I've been set-up...

 

[brockel]

We don’t exchange gifts. Same bank account. If we want something we can buy it for ourselves been that way for 10 years now seems to work just fine. I have the girls go pick something out for her from them that’s about it.

 

[SCliving Outdoors]

My wife and I just celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary yesterday. We have an amazing marriage. She is an unbelievable person. The kindest person I know. We have had multiple years where we haven't given each other "gifts". We have gone on trips a couple years. One year we just agreed to not exchange gifts. There weren't any "repercussions". When we do exchange gifts she's really good about telling me what she wants. This year I bought her a new Bible and a pair of elk antler ear rings because thats what she wanted.

I say all that to say this. Just talk to your wife. Treat her with love and respect every day. Build her up to her face and to your friends when she isn't around. Be a man. Communicate. Even though I do hunt a lot I make it a priority to do things with her so we can spend time together. If you do those things you'd be surprised how everything else (gifts included) falls into place.

Also, don't sell a gun to buy jewelry (unless its an engagement ring). That's just crazy.

 

[Keep on]

It's gotten easier, she finally got a hobby. She's been running for a couple years now and just did her first marathon. I know what size running shoes she wears and just about anything running is appreciated.
She still likes some jewelry now and then, but I just pull that out for the big stuff. Got her a ring this summer for our 25th anniversary.

 

[Irrelevant]

I’m getting my Christmas shopping done early this year, heading to town now.

I just wanted to give a PSA for you young guys who are newly married, or close to getting married. The stages of shopping for your wife/fiancé/girlfriend go like this.

1. You spoil her with nice jewelry you can barley afford. (Here’s a $2,000 necklace I sold a gun to buy)

2. You start getting her nice household items as you move in together. (Here’s a vacuum and some pots and pans)

3. You’re newly married without kids in that honeymoon stage so you go back to getting her nice jewelry/cars/ other expensive things. (We gotta go pick up your new ride at the dealer next week)

4. PAY ATTENTION HERE!!!!

You have kids so it’s all about them, your wife will tell you “we don’t need to exchange gifts, it’s all about the kids”

ITS A TRAP!!!!! The kids will open gifts and at the last second she’ll pull out a couple really thoughtful gifts for you. You’ll stand there like a doofus knowing you have nothing for her, she won’t believe you because she doesn’t believe you are that stupid to actually get her nothing, but she has greatly underestimated your stupidity.

5. You take mental notes of things she brings up she wants over the year, only to forget them and just get her things she uses like perfumes, and other trinkets she’ll never use or wear but you buy anyway because you have no clue what she really wants. (I’m in this stage) (Here’s some perfume that you don’t use because I can’t remember what the bottle looks like, some candles, and some other weird crap. It’s the thought that counts)

Some of you older guys can fill in the rest.

BS!
1. forget her birthday. Forget your wallet on dates so she has to pay. Mention you don't believe in made up holidays right before Valentines day. The goal is to set the bar incredibly low. You may lose a fish once in a while to this thin leader method, but it just makes the ones you catch all that much better.
2. Agree, but never actually on the birthday/xmas, just randomly, I thought you might enjoy this blender...
3. You buy yourself something nice and then chastise her for doing the same. Again, keep that bar LOW.
4/5. It is all about the kids. BUT, at this stage you can slowly start buying actual nice things for her, not every time, but enough to over-achieve, and they should actually be nice things. Vacuums don't count. A trip to Greece does.

 

[Gellar]

I'm somewhere between #5 and @wllm. I keep a running tally of things I want with links and prices. I try to remember what she wants, but then ultimately the day before Amazon says they cant guarantee delivery by Christmas I ask her for her list and I order everything on it.

 

[DouglasR]

pair of elk antler ear rings because thats what she wanted.

I retract my previous statements.
Those sound cool.

 

[Addicting]

Make, model, year, size, color, & website with discount code attached in a text. When she sees a oh I like that. Lots of trial, error, and returns got us to that.

 

[rjthehunter]

We’re not exchanging gifts this year, I spent 5K on my teeth. Perhaps a card.

Was the 5k on teeth a result of the gift you got her last year?

 

[Stocker]

BS!
1. forget her birthday. Forget your wallet on dates so she has to pay. Mention you don't believe in made up holidays right before Valentines day. The goal is to set the bar incredibly low. You may lose a fish once in a while to this thin leader method, but it just makes the ones you catch all that much better.
2. Agree, but never actually on the birthday/xmas, just randomly, I thought you might enjoy this blender...
3. You buy yourself something nice and then chastise her for doing the same. Again, keep that bar LOW.
4/5. It is all about the kids. BUT, at this stage you can slowly start buying actual nice things for her, not every time, but enough to over-achieve, and they should actually be nice things. Vacuums don't count. A trip to Greece does.

To make it worse my wife’s birthday is the 26th.