Bad Hunting Partners

[Hummer]

I primarily hunt solo but in 2018 I had a friend decide he wanted to team up and hunt mule deer in Montana with me. We planned for a 5-6 day hunt. The first morning I could see he wasn’t at all enthusiastic with our hike to a glassing spot. I told him to prepare before we went and we’d be walking/hiking a lot. While walking back to the truck on the third evening, he said he couldn’t hunt anymore and wanted to go home. Said it wasn’t his style of hunting (Midwest tree stand hunter). Instead of being miserable, we cut the hunt short and headed home. What got me was while on our 15 hr drive, he called his family and continually told them how he hated western hunting and he was miserable the whole time. No more trips with him!

Cutting your out of state elk hunt short because he was too lazy to walk, to uncommited to simply try? Hell, he could have stayed in camp and baked cakes for 3 more days while you hunted. I wouldn't have driven him any farther than the nearest bus stop.

I learned long ago to not let other peoples lack of preparedness or commitment keep me from outdoor adventures. I've always been a solo hunter, happier and more successful because of it.

 

[Hilljackoutlaw]

After the second fuel stop his ass would've been calling an uber...probably uber black considering his cash flow. What the hell is wrong with that guy!? Kudos to you for enduring thru that hunt without an aggravated assault charge.

 

[Hilljackoutlaw]

If he had made it known to me before hand he was gonna be unable to contribute for fuel costs then ok...I'm still going I got you covered hop in, but to ask to leave early on top of not telling you he would not pay for fuel is just about the duechiest dueche thing ever!

 

[mtmuley]

Only hunted with one guy that was bad. He moved to Montana from Virginia and went to guide school. Instant expert on Montana hunting. No longer included. mtmuley

 

[NR_Hunter]

I had a long long time friend from high school and hunting buddy ditch me in ND on a waterfowl hunting trip cause he wanted to go home and see his girlfriend before she got her kids back. I told him later we might could not hunt together anymore and he got all butt hurt about it and said it wasn’t fun and this and that and that’s why he wanted to go home. He still rarely pays for gas on hunting trips cause he’s a poor (even tho I’m a poor too)


Anyways, you did the right thing dropping that dude. Good hunting circles are usually very small, and even if you only have a few close hunting buddies, you’ve got a lot.

 

[Sasquatchewan]

One of the main reasons I hunt alone is that none of my friends or relatives are as intense as I am and I respect that.

Still, I hunt with family or good friends from time to time on hunts close to home and normally focus on that person. I still get "burnt" and will wait in parking lots for hours to meet someone who slept in or waiting on someone to do a 2hr morning routine at 5am and show up late to the field. I've decided to no longer "burn energy" or set up some intense hunt only to be disappointed because the other person didn't walk the walk. If I take someone out hunting, we're trying to fill that person's tag, not mine, that way if something happens or a hunt falls through chances of me being disappointed are slim.

 

[Hilljackoutlaw]

as intense as I am

 

[AmericanLongrifle]

Without going into every last detail... over the last few months, Ive had to let go of my long time hunting partner. No, not as in, "he died," I've simply chosen not to hunt with him any longer. In 8 years we had gone on 17 hunts and were successful 16 times. I live in Nevada and have regularly hunted deer, elk and antelope for many years.

This past hunting season, he drew a Nevada bull elk tag. We hunted for 4 days and ended up getting a decent 6 point bull. Two weeks later we went to Idaho. This hunt was arranged by me. It was on 25,000 acres of private property which we had approval to hunt on. I actually kept track of our walking distance in Idaho and learned that in 4 days, we had walked 51 miles.

Now comes the interesting part: Over the years, I started noticing him being not only a tight-ass with his money, but generosity had completely left him and he became inconsiderate of anyone but himself. On the 800 mile trip to Northern Nevada and back, he refused to pay for fuel. I parked at the pumps and expected him to get out since it was his turn. He sat there on his phone as if he had no idea where we were or what we were doing. In Idaho, the pack out (backpacks only) to my pickup was 7.94 miles, which took us a day and 1/2. He then wanted to end the trip short so he could, "relax prior to going back to work!" We had planned to stay till November 1 but left on October 30. He offered me NO meat from his elk and said the scraps which usually go to my three dogs, would be going to someone else. When I strongly questioned him about this he called me an asshole.

Two weeks after returning home, I went back to Idaho by myself... I had some things to prove to ME. Im certainly not afraid to travel alone, camp alone or hunt alone... although my wife was a little nervous about my decision. On day two I killed an elk and spent the next two days getting it out. I was thrilled to death, yet heartbroken at the same time. I'm still a little sad to be honest, but if and when I'm ever mistreated by someone like this I simply move on.

My reason for posting this story is to gain some closure on things.... I am sincerely interested in knowing whether those of you reading this have had a similar experience.. if so, could you please share.

Much love,

DJH Reno, Nv

I have been a similar situation. It sucks. I have always prided myself for working hard on hunts, sharing expenses and trying to help my hunting partner(s) have a great time. If you don't have someone who has the same attitude as you do, it's not going to work and they are taking advantage of your enthusiasm and generosity. If your hunting partner didn't feel it was worth helping you out, then it's not worth your time or energy to continue the partnership. Good on you, to go out and get that elk for YOU. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in trying to help others that I don't ever take care of me.

 

[Gerald Martin]

I have a friend who I met at work that I used to do everything with (camping, mtb'ing, hiking, fishing, hunting, RMEF projects, carpool, he babysat my kids). We even bought our first bows and had them set up at the same archery shop. We both killed our first archery elk (his first elk ever) on the same weekend which included an epic packout. In that same area the next year he said something to the effect of, "This is my favorite thing to do all year." (referring to backpack archery elk hunting). That was almost 10 years ago and it was the last time we hunted together. Even writing this is painful. He went through a rough divorce, and a few years later his Dad committed suicide. I thought hunting would be a good way for him to get away from it all, but he just gave it up. We finally "had it out" a couple years ago after my frustration finally reached its limit. We cried and hugged it out (super uncomfortable for macho guys like us), but it didn't exactly close the rift between us. We still work together and get along ok and occasionally go on bike rides or help each other with little projects, but it's a much more casual relationship - I never depend on him for anything because I cannot deal with the disappointment when he cancels or flakes out.

Like someone else said, you have to hold onto the good memories and let the other crap go or it will eat you up.

I don’t know the situation, so take this criticism for whatever it’s worth, but having a partner go through catastrophic situations like he did and expecting him to be the same isn’t realistic. Grief robs many a person of the “ fire in the belly.” Feeling disappointed and upset with him for not being able to go through with hunts reflects more poorly on you than him , IMO. That’s probably why your relationship is now on a casual level. He realizes you don’t understand how he feels, and there’s nothing he can do to change himself or you.

Totally different than a cheapskate partner or someone to whom flaky seems to be their middle name.

 

[NR_Hunter]

I don’t know the situation, so take this criticism for whatever it’s worth, but having a partner go through catastrophic situations like he did and expecting him to be the same isn’t realistic. Grief robs many a person of the “ fire in the belly.” Feeling disappointed and upset with him for not being able to go through with hunts reflects more poorly on you than him , IMO. That’s probably why your relationship is now on a casual level. He realizes you don’t understand how he feels, and there’s nothing he can do to change himself or you.

Totally different than a cheapskate partner or someone to whom flaky seems to be their middle name.

Damn we really passing the tough to swallow pills out left and right in this thread.

 

[Gerald Martin]

Damn we really passing the tough to swallow pills out left and right in this thread.

Ain’t no love, like tough love....

 

[Aussie_hunter_JD]

If you want to test a man's character let him find someone else's trailcam when he thinks no-ones around.

 

[Ben Sellers]

My hunting partner had trouble with his buddy on a prior trip. Now, We are very clear about expectations before we go. Decisions to leave have to be mutual. We take multiple trucks so people aren’t necessarily tied to each other on where we hunt or when we leave. I’m a big guy and not very fit. I hunt as hard as I can but some days that means you go your way and I go mine. I make it clear that it may mean I’m a glorified camp tender every so often. Also, if you kill one in a hellhole, I will go get one load but I may not be able to do more. But that is a two way street. Camp work is where everyone has to pull their fair share.

Above all, we talk about these issues before we go and find ways to work around them.

 

[fulldraw]

For many years myself and another midwesterner would meet up in Wyoming to hunt with an old high school friend who had enough sense to move to Wyoming when he finished school . We always used our Wyoming friend's hunting rig and his local knowledge and the two of us always paid for all gas, groceries etc. It was pretty simple, the two of us just put in a few hundred bucks in an envelope and put it in the glove box for expenses and when it was gone the two of us would just replenish the envelope with equal amounts of cash. At the end of the hunt if there was any cash left in the envelope we would either just give it to our buddy or use it to buy him something as a token of our appreciation . Worked well for us and we each paid our share.

 

[88man]

Heck I have hunted with some guys that didn't care what anything cost and with a few who didn't want to spend a nickle. I got yelled at for eating the last pickle in a half gallon jar when we had 4 other jars of homemade pickles with us and we were mid way thru the hunt.

 

[jt13]

I have a number of good friends that I will not take out west hunting because I am fearful that we would no longer be friends upon out return. It takes pretty good chemistry to spend every waking hour for 2 weeks together with someone and not have any issues.

 

[furness]

This is why I always hunt alone. I got tied of always being used for an unpaid guide. It was always my travel trailer being used, my tent, my truck, on & on. They would never go along on any scouting trips, and then complain about how the hunting sucks because they didn't get a whatever we were after on the first day. No-one would help fix the equipment before the trip and none of them would help clean up and fix stuff after the trip. One even drove his Subaru separately to out hunting area. I assumed he drove because he was coming home earlier than me, but nope, he said he drove himself so he wouldn't have to pitch in for gas for hauling the travel trailer 600 miles round trip. He & his wife were pretty upset that I wouldn't let him use the trailer for anything- no sleeping, cooking, bathroom, whatever. That was 17 years ago, I think, and they haven't spoken to me to this day. Good riddance.