Funny things you hear

[Moosie]

So our taxidermy shop is getting alot of stuff in. A guy called me up and said he got a badger. Tried to decide if he wanted to spend the money to mount it but drove over to my works office and came in all excited and said :

"Hey Oscar, Come look at the size of this thing and tell me if it's worth mounting....."

I looked at my work buddies and one guy said "Is that a line you use in the bar ?!?!"

....

A few days ago at work we were trying to figure out how to get information on Freddie and Fannie owned loans. One of the Banks Reps came in (Female) and she said there is no way to get ahold of the info we need. I said "We need someone on the indside. Maybe a pretty Woman, to sneak us out what we need"

She replied, "You need a Woman on the inside and I need a Man on the inside".

What she meant and how it came out was fuuuuny. I looked at my Boss and we looked at her and she turned all shades of red. I hadn't laughed that hard in a long time.

....

Let me hear what you've said or heard that was funny !!!

 

[IdahoBugler]

In college a couple of buddies and I would lift weights at the local school gym. They had this cute ditsy blond working the counter. My buddy started talking to her about fishing. She said she fished all the time and was a "masterbaiter". We looked at each other and busted a gut laughing. She was looking at us like we were going crazy. She had no idea why we were laughing and to this day I still think she has no idea what she was saying.

 

[1_pointer]

After a meeting at work, a few folks were talking to Rod, who'd just got back from a two week vacation to Hawaii. He's telling us about the sights and hikes, etc. When one of the guys says, "Rod, did you get lei'd in Hawaii?". Without missing a beat, Rod replies, "We didn't have time". I still don't think he ever got the reference to a 'lei'. Considering the sorta social backwardness and plain straight-lacedness of Rod, that was one of the funnier things I'd experienced at work.

 

[Wyodeerhunter]

This morning at the gas station there were two moose standing by the gas pumps. While I was paying for my energy drink the lady at the counter commented that "This time of year you see a lot more moose because they are coming out of hibernation." |oo

 

[snake river rufus]

Jose said that he "schooled" posters on this forum. Fell out of my chair reading that.

 

[log dawg]

While at the dentist I over here a lady about 30 talking to a friend planning easter dinner and said she would have it at her place .As the coversation was ending she ask her friend what day is easter on and her friend started to laugh and said it's on sunday every year .(The lady did not know that it was always on sunday ) and she was not blond .