Kids and hunting

When my kids were born, we started on horseback at 1 month. As they got bigger they did what I did. Camping, fishing, trapping and shooting. I took them where I worked. We surveyed underground mines, sampled placer mines, pitched camps and camped every nite for weeks at a time.

By the time they could shoot geese they had been plucking geese for two years. They hunted with me for a number of years before they could shoot. They helped me pack many deer and elk out.

Their hunting skills preceded their hunter safety course by years. A few years ago my wife asked my daughter if she would like to go to Hawaii. She responded with I would rather go hunting with dad. She is 40.

I presented a lifestyle not an occasional adventure. My kids and grandkids will continue when I am gone.
 
Something I learned this year while taking my 3 year old girl out hunting with me: Her desire for adventure trumps my desire for success. I am going to continually remind myself of this. I’ve logged so many miles with her in my pack and many more with her at home, and those miles with her in tow have been the highlights of my life. I’ve learned a lot from folks on here on getting kids into the outdoors while not being too overpowering. I’m enjoying this thread, keep it up HT dads!!
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So I just got back from a bit of a failed hunting trip where I took both of my kids (7 and 10) hunting for the weekend and it has me pondering all sorts of things related to kids and hunting.

1. So there are two general ideas for getting kids into hunting. One is to take them along as soon as they show interest, make it fun and easy and enjoyable, and slowly build up to this. The other is to hold them back until they are actually ready for the activity. I have tried and mostly failed at the first method with my kids. But my grandfather implored the latter method with me. I now unconditionally love hunting. And my kids, well they like it, but I'm not sure I'm setting them up for long-term success. There's a lot of drive you can build for an activity by making it exclusive, which is what my grandfather did. I don't think I went deer hunting until I was at least 12 or 13, and didn't get to go to elk camp till either 14 or 15.

2. Sacrifice... There are only so many days we get to hunt each year (at least for those outside of the free-for-all of Montana). How much do you sacrifice your season for your kids? How much does your family sacrifice for your hunting? We only get two weeks here in WA for deer season. I spent one watching kids soccer and took the kids on the other this last weekend. I can count the # of hours of actual "hunting" I did this deer season on one hand. Now it's a 340-ish day wait.


And because no one likes a post without pics...

Like others have said, I don't consider any time spent with my kids outdoors as a failure. Give yourself some credit, you are trying to share what you love with them, seems like you are a high quality father!!

My responses to your questions:

1. The old adage of . . . "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink." I have three kids - one who loves hunting (boy - age 8), one who loves the treats and snacks while hunting (girl - age 6), and one that is just happy all the time (girl - age 3). I try to plan hunts that'll check the box for all three kids. My son will probably do much more hunting than my six year old daughter as they grow up, and I'm totally happy with that. The three year old loves doing what everyone else is doing, so I'm not sure about where she'll land on the hunting topic. While I want to share my passions and hobbies with my children, I also want them to find their own passions. For example, I NEVER EVER EVER dreamed I'd be one of the soccer dads. My son is on a travel soccer team and I've come to look forward to his soccer games. Seasons change, people change. My advice is to keep doing what you're doing, quality time with your children is so much more important, in my opinion, than punching a tag with them in tow.

2. This is a choice for each person to make, and I'm not sure there is a one-size-fits-all answer. I'd give up every hobby, every trip, every personal experience to have a quality and lasting relationship with my wife and children. If hunting becomes a higher priority than my family, rough times lurk ahead. When my youngest child is 18, I'll be 48. There will still be plenty of time, once my kids are out of the house, for me to pursue adventures. With all of that being said, I take a personal week long trip every year to some destination to hunt. In the past it's been Argentina for doves, Canada for waterfowl, Alaska for caribou, etc. Every other hunt or tag that I have is totally devoted to family time. I also take a week off from work and play Mr. Mom while my wife takes a vacation with her sister and/or mother. Something interesting about these "personal" week long hunting trips is that they are getting harder and harder for me. Not because of money, or time away from work, but it's entirely because of the time away from my family. Raising, teaching, working with, and nurturing the next generation is infinitely more important to me that a 200" mule deer, a 400" bull elk, or a pile of birds.
 
My two boys are seven years apart. They didn't go with me until they showed interest and when each did, they were front and center. I didn't take a shot for about 10 years. College and girls took over and they haven't hunted with me in about 10 years. Lots of goofing off and talking on the stand, finding "bear" (dog) tracks, etc. Those times with them are not replaceable and I did not miss "my" hunting one bit. . I have the rest of my life for that.
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Like others have said, I don't consider any time spent with my kids outdoors as a failure. Give yourself some credit, you are trying to share what you love with them, seems like you are a high quality father!!

My responses to your questions:

1. The old adage of . . . "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink." I have three kids - one who loves hunting (boy - age 8), one who loves the treats and snacks while hunting (girl - age 6), and one that is just happy all the time (girl - age 3). I try to plan hunts that'll check the box for all three kids. My son will probably do much more hunting than my six year old daughter as they grow up, and I'm totally happy with that. The three year old loves doing what everyone else is doing, so I'm not sure about where she'll land on the hunting topic. While I want to share my passions and hobbies with my children, I also want them to find their own passions. For example, I NEVER EVER EVER dreamed I'd be one of the soccer dads. My son is on a travel soccer team and I've come to look forward to his soccer games. Seasons change, people change. My advice is to keep doing what you're doing, quality time with your children is so much more important, in my opinion, than punching a tag with them in tow.

2. This is a choice for each person to make, and I'm not sure there is a one-size-fits-all answer. I'd give up every hobby, every trip, every personal experience to have a quality and lasting relationship with my wife and children. If hunting becomes a higher priority than my family, rough times lurk ahead. When my youngest child is 18, I'll be 48. There will still be plenty of time, once my kids are out of the house, for me to pursue adventures. With all of that being said, I take a personal week long trip every year to some destination to hunt. In the past it's been Argentina for doves, Canada for waterfowl, Alaska for caribou, etc. Every other hunt or tag that I have is totally devoted to family time. I also take a week off from work and play Mr. Mom while my wife takes a vacation with her sister and/or mother. Something interesting about these "personal" week long hunting trips is that they are getting harder and harder for me. Not because of money, or time away from work, but it's entirely because of the time away from my family. Raising, teaching, working with, and nurturing the next generation is infinitely more important to me that a 200" mule deer, a 400" bull elk, or a pile of birds.
I'm just not that good of a parent man. Family first is still true, in the big picture, but my passions have not simply gone away or been replaced with the birth of my kids.
 
I'm just not that good of a parent man. Family first is still true, in the big picture, but my passions have not simply gone away or been replaced with the birth of my kids.
Kids don't always come first though. We have a lot on our plate as parents. If you give up what makes life good, you won't be as good of a parent.

 
I'm just not that good of a parent man. Family first is still true, in the big picture, but my passions have not simply gone away or been replaced with the birth of my kids.

I think you're a better parent than you're giving yourself credit for!! Being a parent isn't the easiest thing in the world, we all know that, but it seems like you're on the right path. For me, it's all about balance. I'm one who doesn't require a lot of sleep, so getting up well before my wife and kids everyday is my chance for "me time." When I come home from work, it's all about the family. Also, that week long hunting trip I spoke about earlier scratches the itch for my passions (I don't make the same trip two years in a row). Some people may need more time alone, others may need less time - it all depends on the person. I've gotten to hunt with some wonderful people throughout the years, but my favorite hunting partner(s) is/are my wife and kids - that's just me though, and doesn't necessarily mean that's the only way.
 
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I have 4 children. 2 boy and 2 girls. The three oldest ones have gone hunting with me since they have been out of diapers. Having said that I have had less hard hunting days but more time in the field. I have learned one on one time is far superior, but I can take all three out with me. When taking all three I to make sure we have snacks and drinks of their choosing. I think think we have scared off a bunch of deer, but more important is the children get to see animals. As you can see we do get a few deer, but snacks are very important. When we go ice fishing we always stop for candy and a drink of their choice.
 

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I'm just not that good of a parent man. Family first is still true, in the big picture, but my passions have not simply gone away or been replaced with the birth of my kids.

This one struck a chord. I'm in the same boat, as my oldest has special needs and I often feel like a really SH#% parent. I'm at the point now where I think that may be a normal thing for people who are actually good parents. I have a ton of hobbies and I do try to include my children as much as I can stand. But there are days where both mom and dad gotta go do their thing for bit. Its ok to take some time to yourself in my opinion. My wife and I certainly do this, as sometimes we just got to get a break.
 
This one struck a chord. I'm in the same boat, as my oldest has special needs and I often feel like a really SH#% parent. I'm at the point now where I think that may be a normal thing for people who are actually good parents. I have a ton of hobbies and I do try to include my children as much as I can stand. But there are days where both mom and dad gotta go do their thing for bit. Its ok to take some time to yourself in my opinion. My wife and I certainly do this, as sometimes we just got to get a break.
I think there are a spectrum of good parents. I know there are some out there, that truly love spending every minute with their kids, never lose their temper, and are constantly trying to make the best choice for their kids. I also know some, that thought they really wanted kids, but now that they have them have really struggled with them... BUT they're all great parents doing their best to raise good little humans.

I could be better, but I could be a helluva lot worse. I think a lot of us fall into this category.
 
So I just got back from a bit of a failed hunting trip where I took both of my kids (7 and 10) hunting for the weekend and it has me pondering all sorts of things related to kids and hunting.

1. So there are two general ideas for getting kids into hunting. One is to take them along as soon as they show interest, make it fun and easy and enjoyable, and slowly build up to this. The other is to hold them back until they are actually ready for the activity. I have tried and mostly failed at the first method with my kids. But my grandfather implored the latter method with me. I now unconditionally love hunting. And my kids, well they like it, but I'm not sure I'm setting them up for long-term success. There's a lot of drive you can build for an activity by making it exclusive, which is what my grandfather did. I don't think I went deer hunting until I was at least 12 or 13, and didn't get to go to elk camp till either 14 or 15.

2. Sacrifice... There are only so many days we get to hunt each year (at least for those outside of the free-for-all of Montana). How much do you sacrifice your season for your kids? How much does your family sacrifice for your hunting? We only get two weeks here in WA for deer season. I spent one watching kids soccer and took the kids on the other this last weekend. I can count the # of hours of actual "hunting" I did this deer season on one hand. Now it's a 340-ish day wait.


And because no one likes a post without pics...

Here they are pretending their butt pads are computers.
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As you can see, one is cold-blooded like me, the other runs hot.

And here is what they did why we tried to watch a hill side in the afternoon.
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And for sh!ts and giggles, what is this giant orange horn-butt spider?
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I took my daughters when they wanted to go. We went home when they were done and ready to head back. I didn’t care if they made noise or got bored. I taught them to be better hunters, but never was harsh about it. They both have had success too! I did have the luxury of a long season, but only was able to hunt on the weekends. As someone who has raised his kids and been there…enjoy every single second you have with them in the woods. You will be hunting alone and wishing they were there before you are ready for it. They grow up so fast…and the teenagers usually have so much to do that hunting sometimes doesn’t fit in the schedule.
On a side note: do everything you can to discourage them from the “trophy hunting shows” the guys and gals that put all the emphasis on the antlers. It’s a mistake I made with mine. We watched all the Drury guys and Realtree stuff and my girls were always disappointed when we didn’t have a 160” on camera. It ruined one and she gave it up. She let bucks walk looking for that trophy and eventually just got tired of going.
 
Brought the fam out to Nebraska this year for the late season doe hunt. It’s a pretty low key hunt and I wanted to try and get the kids somewhat involved. While they missed the evening when I got a doe, they “helped” with the skinning and also got to go out for some driving and glassing to see a ton of deer (on properties we didn’t have access to). Still tons of fun and it was validated when my daughter (4) said she wished we lived in Nebraska because there are so many deer as we were leaving. Good memories for sure.

*updated with the responses to the questions: I have no clue what will be right when looking back in the rearview. In asking a good number of friends with kids a little older, it's clear each path for the parents/kiddos will be different when it comes to trying to get kids involved with parent's hobbies. Channeling my days as a fly fishing guide - I just need to remember that certain days are there for my enjoyment, while other days are not. If it's a dedicated family weekend and there ends up being no interest in hunting (or fishing), I try to remember that simply playing in the snow or skipping rocks is okay too. My hope is that with incremental exposure, they will start to ask to participate more. In the meantime, I feel no shame in wanting "my" time to go out and hunt so long as my better half and I can balance the responsibilities on the home front.
 

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This, and having relatively little hunting experience and a giant desire for more is what it comes down to for me, and why I will likely keep big hunting trips to myself for quite a while. I’m 39. My kids are three and five. When they’re grown and out on their own I’ll be 55, at least. My dad’s body started to truly fall apart in his 50s, and I’m already having some problems with my knees and with arthritis.

I want very much to share hunting with my kids, but I also want to accomplish some difficult goals that I couldn’t with them along. I need to get while the gettin’s good. However, my kids are the center of my world. It’s frickin complicated. I’m picking up what you’re putting down, @neffa3

How am I just discovering this thread… but what you said hit me in the soft and squishy places. I’m in the same boat and then some. My boys are 3 and 2 months. I’m 42. Yes, I had a great time doing my thing in my 20’s and early 30’s, but I’ve got to be prepared to be the dad that gets mistaken for Grandpa. It’s gonna happen.

My honest to goodness fear is that my boys will have all the want in the world to be out hunting etc. but I’ll be to old and busted to do it.

The Mrs. and I do our best to get outside whenever we can, and take the boys with always, hell, the baby has already been overnighted in a tent, but my knees have a expiration date. I think that’s why it’s important to me to get big hunting trips done now, while they are young. It’s much easier to do two weeks in AK for a DIY caribou hunt now, than it would be to do it when they are in middle school.

And @neffa3 i hear ya, I’m not one of those dads that wants to spend every minute with his kids. I love them, I love being a dad, but there’s more to me as a person than just being a dad. Don’t feel bad, or selfish for wanting time in the woods by yourself, or just being neffa3 without the dad part attached. That’s just part of being human. Where you talked about the woods being your church, same for be by the way, I remembered a conversation with my mom about church. She always wanted to go the the early service alone, then would go to the later service with the rest of us. I asked her why, and she just said “the early service is for me, the later service is for family.” Sometime you need that time just for you. No shame in that.
 

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