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Greek Living at Universities.

Where you in the Greek System in college, and would you want your college student to?

  • Yes I was, Yes I'd encourage

    Votes: 12 16.0%
  • Yes I was. No I wouldn't

    Votes: 9 12.0%
  • No I wasn't and Yes I'd encourage

    Votes: 3 4.0%
  • No I wasn't and I would not.

    Votes: 51 68.0%

  • Total voters
    75

2rocky

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 23, 2010
Messages
4,954
I became wrapped up in a discussion with another group of friends about fraternities and sororities as a result of the issue with the Oklahoma SAE kerfluffle. Now it is no secret there has been a lot of negative press about the Greek system. That sure doesn't mirror my experience while in a fraternity in college. Now perhaps my house was unique. (We did think we were better than the rest on campus anyway.)

I'm curious if the members here participated in the Greek System and if you would encourage your college student to be a part of it.
 
I have basic social skills but I'm a loner and I've never been much into "male bonding." I went to school on the old G.I. Bill after my "frat" years with the Marines. I was secretly jealous of the college frat parties and women but I spent a lot of time in the wilderness so I survived.

I'm not raising my son to be like me. I'm raising him to learn from my mistakes. I would not encourage him to join a frat but I would not discourage it either; so you were missing my preferred choice on your list. If he is into that kind of thing then I'd honor his judgement. When I look back I sometimes wish that my college life was one big Coors Light Beer commercial but then I wake up. :D
 
I didn't join but didn't encourage or discourage my kids from joining, however..... I've never been compliant with nor a proponent of hazing. IMO, just like most things, it boils down to choices on how to behave.
 
I was in a fraternity and I wouldn't encourage or discourage, but have them evaluate independently and make their own determination.

We didn't have any of the SAE crap that OkSt did at our house, nor some of the other craziness that some of my friends did. Where there some shenanigans, sure, what do you expect when you house 40+ 18-22 yo males in a house.

However, hopefully you kid will stand up for themselves if they are pushed too far and walk away if need be. The downside being that no fraternity will be up front about the stupid chit they do.
 
I made lots of friends without. I also discovered that I did't have to make a lot of stupid mistakes in order to develop a meaningful and relevant perspective on life. Imagine that!
 
One of the best decisions I ever made. Friends for 28 years now and still growing strong. Many are now hunting buddies as well. I could not have imagined being at a large university (20K +) and being out on my own. Loved having a "home" at school, safe place to party, intramural sports and folks who actually gave a crap about me attending class and doing well. BTW, Theta Xi KK560
 
I would say I would want my child to make their own choice. I was only there for 1 year since I switched universities but I still miss the view at our house.

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I chose the "didn't go and would prefer my kids not" option, though I don't feel strongly about the latter and would support their decision either way.

Fraternaties/Sororities to me seem like an artifact from a different time.

I have many friends who were in them, and they are great people who were/are well aware of the reputation that "frat boys" are often perceived as the second coming of the deuchpocalypse, and my friends certainly aren't. Most Frats that I am somewhat familiar with really try to be supportive of academics and positive influences in their communities and schools.

That said, I view hazing of almost any sort as a compromise of personal integrity in the name of tribalism. I'm aware that much has changed, and Greek Institutions are not like they are portrayed in the movies, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't think performing tricks to join a club is a teeny bit pathetic. And though my friends are good guys, they certainly performed some tricks. The secret handshake, top-secret phrases aspect of it is just not my thing.

I attended school in Missoula and Bozeman. If you wanted to meet people you opened your mouth. If you wanted to party you walked down the street. I was too busy being a member of the Fraternal Order Of Hunters and Fishermen - no cheap tricks required, and they certainly don't care about your grades.:eek:

Greek life could be fun, and as evidenced in this thread many find it valuable. But it's probably not for everyone.
 
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I was in a "fraternity" when I was in college. The small school I attended had outlawed actual fraternities/sororities well before I was born so we were considered a student social group. I had a good time and my studies were definitely hurt by the socializing...prior to pledging I was on the Dean's/President's list but after I nearly flunked out of several classes. I moved out of the house (which was the biggest rental we could find after getting kicked out each year) and my grades instantly recovered. I met a couple people that will be friends for life but for the most part it didn't do anything for me except not trust roommates. Actually at the time, being a member of this group basically alienated me from a lot of people so I don't necessarily support Greek Life anymore.
 
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When I started at Montana State University in 1985 none of my friends wanted anything to do with the Frats. However, my friends at University of Montana thought the Frats were awesome. And my friends that moved from MSU to UM went from disparaging frats to joining them.

SAEs have a history... https://news.google.com/newspapers?...AIBAJ&sjid=zOkDAAAAIBAJ&pg=5845,2226143&hl=en

I would encourage my kids to get an education. If they want to party they can do it on their own dime.
 
As a member of Montana State University SAE fraternity of the sixties era ("animal house days"), likely I had more fun than "the law allows" but experiences were shared and friendships were formed with fraternity brothers, with rival fraternity guys, with sorority girls, and with alot of independent students, many of whom I still count as friends. As an avid fisherman and hunter, who also enjoyed an affinity for any brand of cold beer, GPA was unfortunately not the top priority (no excuse, just fact) ... but I did graduate and as predicted by the reality of those times, away I was commissioned into the US Army and endured a couple of fully paid trips to southeast Asia (aka Viet Nam).

However, those were different days and the complexities of discrimination and racial bias were foreign to a Montana raised boy. As others have stated, I allow my kids to make their own choices and can only hope they are fair and wise. But for me, I think perhaps studying more diligently would have been wise ... but then I may have missed some of the fun.
 
I was a frat boy while attending UW-Madison. It was a small mid-west ag. frat (DTS). Good living conditions, food, and of course beer! Nice living with a bunch of farm kids while going to school in the "big city".
 
I have basic social skills but I'm a loner and I've never been much into "male bonding." I went to school on the old G.I. Bill after my "frat" years with the Marines. I was secretly jealous of the college frat parties and women but I spent a lot of time in the wilderness so I survived.

I'm not raising my son to be like me. I'm raising him to learn from my mistakes. I would not encourage him to join a frat but I would not discourage it either; so you were missing my preferred choice on your list. If he is into that kind of thing then I'd honor his judgement. When I look back I sometimes wish that my college life was one big Coors Light Beer commercial but then I wake up. :D

I was in the same situation. By the time, I was out of the Army, my frat days were pretty much behind me.

When I got out and came home to go to school, I went on a 2-3 year bender, living life through some sort of haze the entire time. I was always up for a party but more so for the high than the social aspect.

Then I got it together.:D

My take from what I've seen from relatives and friends who were is that they make you walk around like your poo don't stink, and leave the door open way to wide to set yourself up for failure when you enter the real world. This certainly isn't the outcome for lots of people as shown above, but I've saw my fair share of just this.
 
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It was OU.

This, ^^^^. Not sure how OKSt got involved with the conversation but to be clear the president of the SAE house in Stillwater is black so clearly that racism does not exist in the OKSt SAE house like it did in Norman.

I attended both schools and was a Beta at both. I worked many parties at the SAE house in Norman back in the 90's bartending through college. One of the best was when Vanilla Ice performed at the SAE house but my all time favorite was David Allen Coe at the Beta house.

Anyhow I think young spoiled kids dos stuff like this all the time. This just happened to get caught on tape. These kids act like spoiled brats, especially when drunk. Many of them drive 50k $ cars and have access to credit cards and vacation homes. It really does not surprise me as more of these stories about spoiled fraternity brats acting like fools become more common.

Anybody read about the fraternity who did all the damage to a resort?
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/01/26/fraternities-ski-resort-vandalism-michigan_n_6551064.html
 
I don't really have an opinion either way, but I should let you guys know that I just saw Niedermeyer (Animal House) downtown just now. He's a Missoula resident these days.
 
I graduated from the original "zoo", all the others are wannabes. 27000 students and not once did I ever consider a frat.In fact this site gets a little too "frat like" at times.:D
 
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