Dad Joke thread

[silasd]

Where do they make average?
.
.
.
In a satisfactory...thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week.

 

[2rocky]

 

[Sawtooth]

I would put money on Gandhi if I was a Tibetan man.

 

[Guest member 25165]

Did you guys hear about the blind carpenter??? He picked up his hammer and saw.

 

[noharleyyet]

I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

 

[MarvB]

My daughter was telling her about her science class when I reminded her to
"Don't trust atoms.”

When she asked why I said cuz “They make up everything!"

She walked away....

 

[kansasdad]

 

[Little Big Man MT Chris]

 

[noharleyyet]

• What’s Forrest Gump’s password?
• 
  
• 1forrest1

...made me groan as well.

 

[2rocky]

What did the number 0 say to the number 8?


"Nice belt"

 

[kansasdad]

e e cummings is an anticapitalist

 

[noharleyyet]

A dad joke my kids would send me...


When you sober up and realize what you bought on ebay the night before.

 

[Festus]

I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet?
I asked my 18 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either...

 

[Festus]

My Korean friend died last week.
So Yung.

 

[Irrelevant]

I don't mean to brag, but the cashiers are always checking me out.

 

[jryoung]

How much space do fungi need to grow?

As mushroom as possible

 

[Seeleylakehunter]

What's the difference between right and wrong
My wife is right and I'm wrong.

 

[noharleyyet]

Quite possibly an encore....

 

[jabber]

Did you hear that they are not making yard sticks any longer?

 

[Nick87]

Did you hear that they are not making yard sticks any longer?

Smh, I cant believe how many times I read that until it clicked.