Canyons of Life

[elkduds]

I haven’t updated this in forever. I had lunch yesterday with some Hunt Talkers and questions came up about my girls. I realized I kind of left this hanging.

So this left off after Thanksgiving. Things seemed okay. The week before Christmas, I got home from hunting. My youngest (who tried to overdose last year) was in her room. She was very short and curt, which is unlike her. In addition, she had taken some stuff down in her room.

I pressed the issue, and she made a couple of alarming responses. I called my wife in so she could hear a quick recap of the conversation and then we told her to pack a bag.

We checked her into inpatient treatment that night. Before we left, I hugged her and told her I would be praying for her to identify and come to grips with whatever was dragging her down. Although I was shell shocked, I was also incredibly thankful she was able to make a last minute plea for help in the only way she knew how. She knew damned well what the outcome would be for the statements she made, and I fully believe they were in some way intentional.

She called the next day, which surprised me. She was fairly upbeat, and was taking part in the group sessions and activities, which she didn’t do the first time in. Her meetings with the psychiatrist and counselor were very productive. She called daily. She even called me one day as i was driving home from hunting.

We chatted for over an hour. It was absolutely incredible the revelations she was dumping out. She was able to identify how her toxic relationship with her older sister had greatly played into how she determined her self worth over the years.

In addition, she had watched us go through parental hell and back with both of her older sisters, and decided she would work this out on her own so we didn’t have to carry another burden. She was working with her counselor to develop strategies to deal with this stuff in a healthier way. Her time in group therapy also helped recalibrate her understanding about how much support she really had if she would use it.

We picked her up the day before Christmas. I was very blunt with her. I told her I want to be your biggest cheerleader, but it’s really hard not to be a huge skeptic about anything and everything.

We made a family trip to Great Falls to watch my best friend’s son rope in the circuit finals in January. We took all three girls, two boyfriends, and a friend. It was amazingly drama free and more relaxed than I could have expected.

Things are quieter and more peaceful than they’ve been in years. I have zero expectations it will always be like this. But, one thing I’ve learned through all of this is to simply enjoy the good times for what they are. Every day is an opportunity to make yourself a better person. I’ve had some wonderful visits with my youngest. She has every right to resent and hate her older sister. Instead, she is a shining example of grace and forgiveness that I am humbled to witness.

Wow, just wow in the very best sense of wow. Your posts about this are honest, painful, insightful. You and your wife are so strong together in helping your daughters. I hope and expect that your strength will be what is remembered by your family when years have calmed this turbulent time. I wish most parents I work with had what you have, could do what you have done. Excelsior!

 

[Elkmagnet]

Wonderful news!

 

[Salmonchaser]

Simply outstanding!

 

[blueridge]

I haven’t updated this in forever. I had lunch yesterday with some Hunt Talkers and questions came up about my girls. I realized I kind of left this hanging.

So this left off after Thanksgiving. Things seemed okay. The week before Christmas, I got home from hunting. My youngest (who tried to overdose last year) was in her room. She was very short and curt, which is unlike her. In addition, she had taken some stuff down in her room.

I pressed the issue, and she made a couple of alarming responses. I called my wife in so she could hear a quick recap of the conversation and then we told her to pack a bag.

We checked her into inpatient treatment that night. Before we left, I hugged her and told her I would be praying for her to identify and come to grips with whatever was dragging her down. Although I was shell shocked, I was also incredibly thankful she was able to make a last minute plea for help in the only way she knew how. She knew damned well what the outcome would be for the statements she made, and I fully believe they were in some way intentional.

She called the next day, which surprised me. She was fairly upbeat, and was taking part in the group sessions and activities, which she didn’t do the first time in. Her meetings with the psychiatrist and counselor were very productive. She called daily. She even called me one day as i was driving home from hunting.

We chatted for over an hour. It was absolutely incredible the revelations she was dumping out. She was able to identify how her toxic relationship with her older sister had greatly played into how she determined her self worth over the years.

In addition, she had watched us go through parental hell and back with both of her older sisters, and decided she would work this out on her own so we didn’t have to carry another burden. She was working with her counselor to develop strategies to deal with this stuff in a healthier way. Her time in group therapy also helped recalibrate her understanding about how much support she really had if she would use it.

We picked her up the day before Christmas. I was very blunt with her. I told her I want to be your biggest cheerleader, but it’s really hard not to be a huge skeptic about anything and everything.

We made a family trip to Great Falls to watch my best friend’s son rope in the circuit finals in January. We took all three girls, two boyfriends, and a friend. It was amazingly drama free and more relaxed than I could have expected.

Things are quieter and more peaceful than they’ve been in years. I have zero expectations it will always be like this. But, one thing I’ve learned through all of this is to simply enjoy the good times for what they are. Every day is an opportunity to make yourself a better person. I’ve had some wonderful visits with my youngest. She has every right to resent and hate her older sister. Instead, she is a shining example of grace and forgiveness that I am humbled to witness.

Love hearing this, Jason! Soooo much.

 

[noharleyyet]

Heartening news JLS, been thinking about y’all. Thanks for the update.

 

[geetar]

@JLS I’m glad to hear things are going better. Continued prayers for you and your family.

 

[tillicant]

Been following, silently. cheering along the way and, as with anyone else realizing it could be our family.
Great progress! keep with it.

 

[Djfan]

Praying with you.

 

[Jbotto]

That’s a great update! I will keep praying for you and your family!

 

[rjthehunter]

Thanks for the update. I'm glad to hear the inpatient worked well for her! Keeping you guys in my prayers.

 

[JEL]

Been thinking about you and your family. Glad to hear this welcome news.