An Arts & Crafts Query For Randy11

[noharleyyet]

In regards to critter detritus decoration...when embellishing bear plugs, would spraypaint be the prudent choice?

 

[tarheel]

Long as it's gold or silver spray paint, or Ford blue and Chevy red.

 

[Randy11]

In regards to critter detritus decoration...when embellishing bear plugs, would spraypaint be the prudent choice?

Man, what an open ended question.
There's a lot of variables here, hopefully I can break it down a little for you.

This is not what your painted shit to look like!

First off, not all bear scat is equal. Depending on the bear's diet, the texture can vary anywhere from a pressed grass redbull can, to a steaming pile of creamed corn and pudding.

I'll break it down by type-

Cleveland Fumo gero

Cleveland Fumo gero is found as soon as bears emerge from hibernation, up through the end of June and sometimes in to July. For bear scat painting enthusiasts, this is prime time. It is mainly based of grass, although the occasional sample may contain hair or bones from carrion.

The method that works so well is dipping. I recommend collecting Cleveland Fumo gero, and letting it dry in a cool dry spot for a day or two before tackling it. I find that cheap wood cooking skewers work best for this. Shitzkabobs if you will...

For paint, you want to go with a high quality exterior latex based paint. I recommend this-
http://www.ppgpittsburghpaints.com/our_products/exterior_paints/index.htm#ovr_ext_mht
PPG Manor Hall is expensive, but worth it IMO. It says one coat only, but lets be honest, we're painting feces here not a house, give her a couple. Cookie cooling racks work best for a drying apparatus (rinse before returning to kitchen).

If you pick out a quality deposit, and take your time, your finished product should look something like this-

Beautiful, really.


Next we'll examine gero bacca sperma liquidus

Gero bacca sperma liquidus is tricky, and frankly only for the really devoted enthusiast. The season of gbsl is the season of the berry, from late June through the end of October. It can consist of huckleberries, elderberries, blueberries etc.

The trick with gbsl is trying to contain the high amounts of liquid in the medium. You NEED to dry in order to get any kind of solid finished product. The same baking cooling rack from earlier should work, just add tinfoil if needed.

This is where you are correct with the spray paint. After your pile has solidified to some point, I suggest tackling it with this line-
http://www.ppgpittsburghpaints.com/...bull_interior_exterior_spray_enamel/index.htm

Again, PPG is quality. You want the best. You'll need to do multiple coatings, as gbsl likes to absorb. Honestly you're looking at a 2:1 ratio of poo to paint here. I like red.

Your finished product should look something like this-

Nowhere near as easy on the eyes as a completed Cleveland Fumo gero.


Mind you, this is only with black bears, and only up here in MT. Down in the lone star state I image you'd have more barbecue sauce and beans in your medium.

I hope I was of some assistance...

 

[mtlion]

Wow. Mind is blown.

Wow.

 

[mtlion]

I think I understand your siggy now.

The sentiments of the hunt then become translated into art

 

[Dinkshooter]

The hippies crying thread scares me less.

 

[DRAFTSTUD]

Man, Randy11 really know his chit! John

 

[mtlion]

Man, Randy11 really know his chit! John

Sure when it's a bear. How does he handle cat scat?

 

[huntme]

this post is nothing but crap!

 

[noharleyyet]

Epic riposte Randy...figgered you knew your ****!

 

[shoots-straight]

I can't take anymore of this shit!

 

[Randy11]

Sure when it's a bear. How does he handle cat scat?

Cocoa beatitas lac lactis!? Please take this thread more serious...

 

[Randy11]

The hippies crying thread scares me less.

You're only a mushroom away...