A little humour for your day

A pastor's wife was expecting a baby, so he stood before the congregation and asked for a salary raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the pastor's family expanded, so would his paycheck. After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the pastor's expanding salary.
A great deal of yelling and inner bickering ensued, as to how much the pastor's additional children were costing the church, and how much more it could potentially cost. After listening to them for about an hour, the pastor rose from his chair and spoke, "Children are a gift from God, and we will take as many gifts as He gives us." Silence fell over the congregation.

In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand and finally said in her frail voice, "Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers."

The entire congregation said "Amen."
 
I didn't make it to the end either but a few observations. If he did actually plan on launching the boat, why didn't he pull the hold-down straps on stern? Why would he toss out the bumpers if he was only practicing launch? Hard to believe anyone practicing launching a boat could be that slow a learner ... and still have intellectual capacity to breathe. Why would someone practicing launching be wearing a huge floppy Sombrero sun hat? No, he was planning on operating that boat. Watching the show he put on walking around the trailer, kicking tires (why?), waving arms, and staggering back to the driver's seat, made me conclude this guy was so drunk he really had no business behind wheel of boat or car. Hopefully someone intervened and called the cops before there was an injury. Something was really wrong with him!
 
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I spent one day watching launch ramp & boat fiascos. It set me back 2 days in my sciatica recovery laughing.
10 years of Lake Patrol and not being able to laugh at the disasters was made up in a day. The arrests made in the parking lots before the ensuing disasters happen were just as priceless.
They never made up for the ambulance trips that happened after.
 
I didn't make it to the end either but a few observations. If he did actually plan on launching the boat, why didn't he pull the hold-down straps on stern? Why would he toss out the bumpers if he was only practicing launch? Hard to believe anyone practicing launching a boat could be that slow a learner ... and still have intellectual capacity to breathe. Why would someone practicing launching be wearing a huge floppy Sombrero sun hat? No, he was planning on operating that boat. Watching the show he put on walking around the trailer, kicking tires (why?), waving arms, and staggering back to the driver's seat, made me conclude this guy was so drunk he really had no business behind wheel of boat or car. Hopefully someone intervened and called the cops before there was an injury. Something was really wrong with him!

I also noticed the straps. I figured after he got out and kicked the tires everything would have fell into place.
 
I also noticed the straps. I figured after he got out and kicked the tires everything would have fell into place.
He was thinking a flat tire on the trailer made it go in directions contrary to where he wanted it to go.
I agree that he was either too drunk to be behind the wheel or too inept to even possess a vehicle with reverse drive.
 
He was thinking a flat tire on the trailer made it go in directions contrary to where he wanted it to go.
I agree that he was either too drunk to be behind the wheel or too inept to even possess a vehicle with reverse drive.
It's the sober ones that do that that get me. In the should not drive at all group.
 
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