Gastro Gnome - Eat Better Wherever

5 things about you.

1. Flew in an acrobatic plane with a 71 year old female pilot. She was one of only a few female pilots in WW II. She was part of the WASP program. Did barrel roles and loop the loops, but after a hammer head maneuver, I about lost my lunch.
2. Spent a summer volunteering in the Mother Teresa orphanage in the Huruma slum of Nairobi, Kenya. Got to help some amazing people doing amazing things for the less fortunate.
3. Lived with a Dine family on the Navajo Reservation for two months. Learned about their culture, history, and their day to day life on their sheep ranch. Loved the Dine sense of humor. A truly resilient people.
4. Shot two roe bucks in England. Thanks to the kindness and hospitality of fellow Hunt Talker @devon deer .
5. Was false charged by a bull moose not once but four times while hunting for mule deer. Bull came as close as fifteen yards before stopping. Then would let me get fifty yards away before dropping his head and running at me again. Moral of the story, if you decide to help a successful moose hunter load up his rutted up bull into his trailer the night before your deer season starts, make sure to change your clothes and that you are musk free before going out the next morning.
 
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Packing your mule deer and your bear out didn’t make the lifetime achievement list? 😏

That mule deer still ranks #1 as my all time most miserable pack out.
I'm saving some for the 5 most miserable moments thread. That deer pack out will consume 1 thru 3 though for me, due to the wrong turn we took, and me shooting the wrong deer 😩.
 
Best Sierra backpack trip.
Taboose Pass. 11,500ft. 6k ft gain in 9 miles, Did it twice.
The second time I met up with my bro & some of his friends from HS. I had been at base for a couple days fishing when they rolled in. 9 of us would be going. One was Gaye. She came with another couple. Had not seen her in years. 4 years older. Blonde.
We made it to the lake @ 9k and only water until other side. Good 1st night spot.
The next day everyone had altitude sickness but me, and Gaye. We would go up and set up camp @ Bench Lake.
Turns out she had moved to Hawaii and was living with a pro football player and had been in Playboy...
& she only wore clothes when needed. Kelty Pack & Lowas.
We waited at Bench Lake for 4 days for the rest of the gang. Fishing. Hiking. Sunning. They never showed up.
Never saw anyone until the trip back down and we ran into a dad & son heading up the pass. Dad said the rest had gone to the bottom and were still sick. The kids eyes almost popped out and dad slapped the back of his head and they went up. She at least had a bandana on her head then.
We showed up suntanned and fit at the base. They did not look as happy as I was.

A year later I went to her wedding to the huge football player. He came over later and put his paw on my shoulder and thanked me for looking out for her on that backpacking trip. She had taken pictures he said...LOL.
We had a cigar and drank to the good times.
 
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1. Had a grey squirrel, which was on fire, jump on my head.

2. Thru-hiked the Appalachian Trail. Walked a segment of 122 miles in 4 days, then ate six Sonic cheeseburgers at a sitting.

3. Climbed a tree to get within 10 feet of a roosted turkey. On another occasion climbed a tree and had a turkey come roost on the branch I was on, close enough to touch.

4. I attempted to tackle a semi-tame antelope on a golf course in Africa 🙄

5. Got charged by a bison, I ran like mad then jumped off a short cliff into a river to escape.
 
Alright I've thought about it long enough to come up with a few for my lame life since we're comparing this to my friends

1-slept with pretty much all my high school buddies sisters (nothing to be proud of wouldn't recommend)
2-had an Angus bull go ape shit on the ground blind I was sitting in
3-married my high school girlfriend (there was a 10 year hiatus of stupidity in there)
4-bought my first house when I was 19
5-quit a job with a months vacation and top seniority spot only to make less per year with no vacation because there's only so much of a douchebag boss one can take.
 
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I do know surfing BC has gotten to be a thing.
The Bamfield area Coasties had been practicing rolls in HUGE waves out by the outer islands and stopped and just watched me for a while. I left my board with them when I left and said have fun.

I was only blonde until 5 & only semi-good looking...ever
Back 45 years ago, TOFINO, About 75 miles from here was a hideout for hippies and people who just wanted to ''hide''. (warmer than ALASKA). Now those hippies are $$$$$$$ selling their $2000 lots for a fortune....indians have built big resorts and its become canada's surfing capitol.......down south island,SOMBRIO BEACH has been taken over by developers and they are building multi million dollar homes.......all the cool folks have moved on to parts unknown.
 
1- Got pulled off a cliff via the long line of a Lama helicopter.
2- Found and inventoried 300+ miles of existing and previously-existing Forest Service trails (alone over 5 years) using only a map and compass (no GPS) and wrote the guide for the (no-name) range.
3- Saved a pronghorn & mule deer migration bottleneck from O&G leasing.
4- Won first prize in a writing contest.
5- Climbed the highest peak in Wyoming.
 
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@kwyeewyk wildlife ones.
1. Kicked a cougar in self defense
2. Been flogged by a wild turkey
3. Had a black bear press his nose into my tent <1' above my face.
4. Repeatedly punched two baby mountain goats in wack-a-mole fashion as they tried to play king of the mountain on my tent while I tried to sleep.
5. Had to fend off repeated attacks(?) from a large bull sea lion with my kayak paddle off Vancouver Island.
#5, for those who never had the pleasure, BULL SEALIONS can easily weigh a ton !! they DO have an odd sense of humor.........we used to fish for herring at night in long aluminum boats called herring skiffs
A crew of 5 manned the net , before it was illegal,we could fish fish 24 hours a day...pay checks of 2-$3000 dollars was common.......we worked around the clock for several days at a time........
anyhow, those big bulls would run thru our nets several times then come up along side, roll on their backs and deficate,all the while growling like crazy lions.....they have sunk all kinds of boats,simply by their size...jumping on the swim grids of small yachts, jumping on kayaks and runabouts.......I am not aware of them killing a person,well,not on purpose.....
 
1. Double total hip replacement (right side 14 years before the left one ). Not great genetics that I pray I didn’t pass on to my kids.

2. I’ve been known to eat termites (lived in Kenya as a kid). Also have had eland, warthog, impala, Thompson’s and Grant‘s gazelle, oryx, Cape Buffalo, wildebeest, topi, Koch’s hartebeest, and an assortment of francolins/Guinea fowl. Dad also took lessor and greater kudu, leopard, and elephant but I don’t think that meat made it home, and for sure the waterbuck and zebras weren’t served at home.

3. Had a near miss brush with a spitting cobra that was hiding in the campfire woodpile. And I can tell you the “siafu” (safari ants) bites are painful!

4. Had cold weather gear issued to me for my mobility bag as a USAF dental officer. Had Desert Storm caused large death numbers, I would have gone to Dover AFB where there is a huge morgue set up in an airplane hanger for mass casualty body identification.

5. USAF marksman award for the one and only time shooting a handgun.
Have a friend in South Africa who is a minister in a Dutch Reform church......Packs his handgun everywhere..........he loves his fellow man, well, not all of them !!! he says the artillary is for protection from the lions that prowl around the little town.....we know better!!..........Any BILTONG recipies
 
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Alright I've thought about it long enough to come up with a few for my lame life since we're comparing this to my friends

1-slept with pretty much all my high school buddies sisters (nothing to be proud of wouldn't recommend)
2-had an Angus bull go ape shit on the ground blind I was sitting in
3-married my high school girlfriend (there was a 10 year hiatus of stupidity in there)
4-bought my first house when I was 19
5-quit a job with a months vacation and top seniority spot only to make less per year with no vacation because there's only so much of a douchebag boss one can take.
Just like the other thread I thought of a #6

6- made more money my first year out of high school than I literally knew what to do with. Man if a guy could go back in time...
 
Best Sierra backpack trip.
Taboose Pass. 11,500ft. 6k ft gain in 9 miles, Did it twice.
The second time I met up with my bro & some of his friends from HS. I had been at base for a couple days fishing when they rolled in. 9 of us would be going. One was Gaye. She came with another couple. Had not seen her in years. 4 years older. Blonde.
We made it to the lake @ 9k and only water until other side. Good 1st night spot.
The next day everyone had altitude sickness but me, and Gaye. We would go up and set up camp @ Bench Lake.
Turns out she had moved to Hawaii and was living with a pro football player and had been in Playboy...
& she only wore clothes when needed. Kelty Pack & Lowas.
We waited at Bench Lake for 4 days for the rest of the gang. Fishing. Hiking. Sunning. They never showed up.
Never saw anyone until the trip back down and we ran into a dad & son heading up the pass. Dad said the rest had gone to the bottom and were still sick. The kids eyes almost popped out and dad slapped the back of his head and they went up. She at least had a bandana on her head then.
We showed up suntanned and fit at the base. They did not look as happy as I was.

A year later I went to her wedding to the huge football player. He came over later and put his paw on my shoulder and thanked me for looking out for her on that backpacking trip. She had taken pictures he said...LOL.
We had a cigar and drank to the good times.
Living at sea level,most of my life, HEADACHES above 6000 ft.
PAMALA ANDERSON buys donuts at a little shop south of here in LADYSMITH where we go after elk shed hunting...... she always brings a smile to my face......hey,I'm old- not dead !!!
 
1) lit a potato on fire in the microwave while “baking” it, fire dept was called
In second grade I was a serious rock hound. I’d take a magnet to school and during recess would Hoover-up iron dust from the gopher mounds on the playground, then scrape the iron into a ziplock bag. I had dozens of these bags of iron. One day a buddy from class tells me that if I fill a bowl with the iron and put an egg with a small hole punctured in the bottom of it in the middle of the bowl, then put the whole thing in the microwave for about five minutes on High, the iron would move up into the egg and solidify into a perfect iron egg. Sounded sweet to me.

That day when I got home, I told my dad about this trick, and asked if we could do it. Being a rock hound himself, he was on board. I’ll never forget the ring of flames that instantly burst from that bowl, and the way the entire thing seemed to explode with light. It was awesome. I’m not exactly sure what my dad told my mom when she got home from work a couple hours later, but I’ll never forget the look of panic on his face when he told me, “Don’t tell your mother how this happened.”
 
In 1968 after Bobby & King were killed I asked Grandpa what was happening?
He said ," Honey-boy, you have to understand this country has always had 25% morons, complete idiots and 10% criminally insane. The choice is up to you."
Wow.

1972 and the 1st day at basic the Chief said, " Some of you may never master a stir spoon. Some may become officers. Some may die for their country. You will become someone your country can be proud of. Or your out."
Wow.

My 1st book from Grandpa was the collected works of Kipling. From Grandma a Petersons bird book.
From Mom it was a how too book. Dad's was a book on fishing.
I was 5. I could read when I was 4.

Life is what you make of it. Dying is easy. Takes a second. Make the most of what you have. Living can take you anywhere and last forever.
 
1. Had a grey squirrel, which was on fire, jump on my head.

2. Thru-hiked the Appalachian Trail. Walked a segment of 122 miles in 4 days, then ate six Sonic cheeseburgers at a sitting.

3. Climbed a tree to get within 10 feet of a roosted turkey. On another occasion climbed a tree and had a turkey come roost on the branch I was on, close enough to touch.

4. I attempted to tackle a semi-tame antelope on a golf course in Africa 🙄

5. Got charged by a bison, I ran like mad then jumped off a short cliff into a river to escape.
#1 Oh my, Can't stop smiling thinking about that one.
 

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