Sh*t our kids do

[Jbotto]

I’m following this one for sure. As a new dad, I’m going to try and learn a bit from every story. Thanks for this!

 

[thomas89]

My daughter is awful about taking medicine when she’s sick. My wife was up trying to coax her into taking her middle of the night dose, and got a bit irritated at the constant back and forth. As my wife is raising her voice, I hear our 6 year old tell her, “you better keep it down or you’ll wake up Dad!”

 

[EYJONAS!]

How about this little tractor trailer setup. He told me one day I'll haul big equipment just like you dad.

He even secures the load with straps.

So cool

 

[BackofBeyond]

How about this little tractor trailer setup. He told me one day I'll haul big equipment just like you dad.

He even secures the load with straps.

So cool View attachment 221309View attachment 221310

my little guy does the same, every construction site we drive past it’s “daddy that’s my ‘struction site.” And “I built that.”

 

[ZMT588]

Check this outfit out. Bike helmet, school clothes (mom is pissed), karate belt, wooden weapons, football gloves. Just flat impressive.

He dresses like his father.

 

[WildWill]

I took her mother's nail polish from her and put it on a high shelf. She took this as a challenge thank God the skirt broke her fall.

 

[kwyeewyk]

My daughter took a bunch of produce out of the fridge and smashed it on the floor, and when mom found her sitting in it she threw her hands in the air and dramatically shouted "fruit salad!"

Couple years later she convinced her 2yo little brother to let her cover him with most of a jar of peanut butter.

He would take stuff and put it one of 2 places, the toilet or the trash, anything that disappeared and never turned up we blame him for.

We had a boar pig they named Big Buddy who had a set on him that would make Cousin Eddy proud and the kids took notice, one day on a hike we found a tree with a giant double burl on the trunk and one of them pointed and yelled Big Buddy balls! Now that's the name of that hike.

 

[WildWill]

My daughter "playing" silence of the lambs with her mema's
baby cpr dummy.

 

[Jack Ryan]

Food time was always good for a laugh when they were in high chairs. It was always part of the bedtime routine, snack, bed time. My son and daughter were less than a year apart and often mistaken for twins. Can't even count how many times they would both fall asleep at the same time in their high chair. Food in hands, on their face, if not face first in the food.

Never forget pulling macaroni and cheese out of my boys nose when he was at that age and every piece seemed like it HAS TO BE THE LAST ONE.

 

[LukeDuke]

We grew up in rural SD and had 4 boys in my family, all about two yrs apart. My youngest brother, who was probably 5 at the time, had one of the most epic first day of summer sayings I have ever heard. We were all sitting around the breakfast table and very excited to begin the summer shenanigans when he looks over at dad and says “dad, can you give us our spankings now, because you know we are going to do something bad today”….damn, I still laugh just thinking about it.

 

[Scott85]

My son is 15 so the only thing I want to do is take a sledge hammer to his PlayStation and cellphone.

 

[Dougfirtree]

I have three sons and the ridiculousness could not fit into one Hunt Talk thread (plus I've blocked much of it out to preserve my sanity). But, this thread did remind me a great memory. My wife ran a childcare business out of our house, for a while. One October morning, I shot a deer early in the morning and the forecast said it would be in the 60's that day. So, I brought it right home and started butchering in the shed. All the little rugrats sat quietly on a beam of wood, for about two hours, just watching. No questions, just watching. I love this pic:

 

[Nick87]

How about this little tractor trailer setup. He told me one day I'll haul big equipment just like you dad.

He even secures the load with straps.

So cool View attachment 221309View attachment 221310

You mean like this? I need to figure out how to post the videos here.

 

[Sasquatchewan]

I wish I loved anything as much as my kids love taking one bite out of an apple and setting it on the table and walking away.

My youngest does that with cucumbers too...

The cucumber thief:



She was also going through a phase where she wore that Paw Patrol costume for a month straight and at the very least 5 scrunchies...

 

[EYJONAS!]

You mean like this? I need to figure out how to post the videos here.
View attachment 221321

Yeah we've done that too. It's a real bitch on the power wheels rear end.

 

[JShane]

I was telling my haircutter about this today and the lady under the drier about died laughing… we used to sit in the 2nd row for church. All the old people behind us would egg our kids on and laugh about it. One Sunday after communion the priest was doing his thing and its dead quiet in church, the 1 year old at the time stands on the pew and yells “Awww bullshit!” We sit in the back now.

delayed response to the package not being everglades seasoning

 

[Stocker]

My daughter unfortunately is just like me, an absolute menace. She had just turned 2 and I laid her down for a nap. I was glassing for deer off the back porch at noon. A really nice buck follows a doe into some cedars about 600 yards behind my house. I grab the muzzleloader and sneak to within 10 yards of him. He’s laying so I can’t get a shot. The whole time thinking I bet she’s waking up. Finally I make decide to just make it happen. The buck busts and only gives me a Texas heart shot so I pass. When I walk in the house my daughter is on top of the fridge.

About the same time she was carrying her crayons across the living room and dropped them. She spoke with quite a lisp when she was younger but said “G-D it” just plain as day. It’s hard not to laugh sometimes.

My son lives in his own world and is completely oblivious to anything anyone tells him. He’s been known to take the trash out and end up a mile from the house throwing rocks in the creek. My wife used to freak out but now she knows he’s fine. She does freak out when he does it in school/church clothes.

 

[Straight Arrow]

Grandkids sitting around the campfire at YNP, telling unbelievable fishing stories.

 

[Dave N]

Kids (2 daughters about 17 months apart) were pretty young yet and one night I woke up hearing a banging sound downstairs. Kept hearing it so I went to investigate. Found them in the hallway unwrapping EVERY SINGLE Christmas present that was under the tree. The banging was a door that one girl was leaning on. Huge pile of paper on the floor. Woke the wife and got the kids back to bed. Once Christmas actually came, the oldest would say what was in the package before anyone opened it.

 

[MNElkNut]

This happens in a house we were renting while we built our house. I have twin boys and when they were about 2 years old they were in the kitchen. My wife was packing for our vacation the next day and I was gone somewhere. She heard giggling. Then more giggling. Then even more. Curious what they could be doing, she snuck into the kitchen. Both boys were sitting down. One had a stick of butter and was eating it like a popsicle. Both boys were taking turns throwing eggs at the cupboards and giggling when the eggs broke and ran down the fronts of the cupboards creating a huge mess!