PETA Jerky

[Redman]

*Disclaimer*
No I didn't pay for it!
No I would never pay for it!
No I would never recommend it!
Yes I did eat a whole bag!
Yes animals were hurt in the making of this review!
So my neighbor Rex works for a well known "snack" company and he is always dropping by all sorts of things that they have that are new, old, or over stocked. Well he dropped off a bag of "chips" that also had a box of Jerky..... Then I read the label!

Curiosity got the best of me so I opened the bag and pulled a chunk out. Looks like cheap gas station mystery meat jerky but lighter in color. With my wife watching I reluctantly put it in my mouth and chewed....well a little funny taste at first..texture was the same as the cheap jerky...not disgusting at all. She tried it and agreed with me. I ate the whole bag! Mung Beans...who would have thought?? Fast forward to bedtime....(this is where the animal injury comes in!) I start feeling a bit...well like I have to rip one. Soooo I let it fly like a long drawn out buck grunt. My wife starts laughing so hard she has tears running down her face! Then our dog Brenna, who sleeps on the floor beside the bed, starts growling, yelping, and biting at her tail! My wife is now gagging, cussing, and crying! I start coughing and gagging! That is possibly the worst thing I have ever smelled in my life! This went on all night! Poor Brenna thought she was doing it and dog farts aren't even that bad!
This non meat jerky is a environmental hazard and can cause harm or death to your dog!

Just proof if you can make jerky out of anything....but....should you?

 

[RobertD]

Saw it in a gas station for the first time a few days ago. My question is who is the market for this product. How many people want this badly to eat meat but also to not eat meat.

Maybe the existence of fake meat products like this belies the general lack of appeal of meatless diets in general.

 

[44hunter45]

Took our granddaughter out to dinner last night. I forgot my reading glasses and I order a burger off the menu.

My son says, "Are you sure you want that, Dad?"
Me, "Why not?"
Son, " It's not meat"
Me, " It says, 'Burger', 'It's in the Burger section of the menu.'"
Son, " It's 'Beyond Meat' "
Me, "FFS"
Mrs45, " Language!!"
Me to server (who is ROFLOL), " Look, I want a burger, with meat, real meat, red meat, and I want it bleeding. "
Server, " It happens all the time. One raw burger, Sir?"
Me, "Yes, please. Please excuse my language."

She walks back to the kitchen and I hear peals of laughter coming out of the back.

 

[Redman]

Saw it in a gas station for the first time a few days ago. My question is who is the market for this product. How many people want this badly to eat meat but also to not eat meat.

Maybe the existence of fake meat products like this belies the general lack of appeal of meatless diets in general.

Must not be too many in the market because it wasn't close to out of date...so it was probably overstock that wasn't selling. What it does to your digestive system should be a crime in itself!

 

[F250]

Not happening ! No freakin way will I eat that !!

 

[Gr8bawana]

That stuff looks like chunks of dog food.

 

[Redman]

That stuff looks like chunks of dog food.

I thunk if I tried to feed that sh%$ to my dog she would bite me!

 

[chuckchili]

Mung beans as the first ingredient? Don’t know what that is but food that sounds like it came out of a body orifice sounds yummy.

 

[kwyeewyk]

 

[shrapnel]

The whole vegetarian concept is such a joke. They are always trying to make a plant taste like meat. If plants were so darned good tasting, why isn’t someone trying to make a rib eye taste like broccoli?

 

[Treeshark]

I know you told us of your horrendous gas as a cautionary tale to help us avoid this product, but I must admit it is having the exact opposite effect on me.

 

[jryoung]

The whole vegetarian concept is such a joke. They are always trying to make a plant taste like meat. If plants were so darned good tasting, why isn’t someone trying to make a rib eye taste like broccoli?

The irony is meat often tastes less like meat now than it did before. We mask, blend, and finish meat every which way so it's palatable for those with sensitive palates.

 

[EKYHunter]

Don’t these freaks know that plants are alive as well? They eat the once living plant, they take its seeds, eat it’s babies, etc.

 

[Redman]

I know you told us of your horrendous gas as a cautionary tale to help us avoid this product, but I must admit it is having the exact opposite effect on me.

I understand and all reviews should be honest and have some positive comments. I considered putting some in a empty Jack Links bag (because I don't want people seeing me eat fake meat) and consuming it on the next long drive with my hunting buddies! I did find some in the store yesterday $6 a freaking bag NO WAY!!

 

[duckhunt]

*Disclaimer*
No I didn't pay for it!
No I would never pay for it!
No I would never recommend it!
Yes I did eat a whole bag!
Yes animals were hurt in the making of this review!
So my neighbor Rex works for a well known "snack" company and he is always dropping by all sorts of things that they have that are new, old, or over stocked. Well he dropped off a bag of "chips" that also had a box of Jerky..... Then I read the label!
View attachment 258067
Curiosity got the best of me so I opened the bag and pulled a chunk out. Looks like cheap gas station mystery meat jerky but lighter in color. With my wife watching I reluctantly put it in my mouth and chewed....well a little funny taste at first..texture was the same as the cheap jerky...not disgusting at all. She tried it and agreed with me. I ate the whole bag! Mung Beans...who would have thought?? Fast forward to bedtime....(this is where the animal injury comes in!) I start feeling a bit...well like I have to rip one. Soooo I let it fly like a long drawn out buck grunt. My wife starts laughing so hard she has tears running down her face! Then our dog Brenna, who sleeps on the floor beside the bed, starts growling, yelping, and biting at her tail! My wife is now gagging, cussing, and crying! I start coughing and gagging! That is possibly the worst thing I have ever smelled in my life! This went on all night! Poor Brenna thought she was doing it and dog farts aren't even that bad!
This non meat jerky is a environmental hazard and can cause harm or death to your dog!
View attachment 258069
Just proof if you can make jerky out of anything....but....should you?

This is freaking hilarious.

 

[EastTNHunter]

Funny stuff. I think that I read somewhere recently that the “beyond meat” market had cratered. Darn

 

[Bullshot]

I considered putting some in a empty Jack Links bag (because I don't want people seeing me eat fake meat) and consuming it on the next long drive with my hunting buddies!

Since guys never grow up It could be re-packaged and re-marketed as a harmless gag gift, rather than an alternative dietary choice, and sales would likely soar.

 

[Redman]

Since guys never grow up It could be re-packaged and re-marketed as a harmless gag gift, rather than an alternative dietary choice, and sales would likely soar.

The only problem is that Sh#+ is not harmless! It will destroy more people's sense of smell than COVID and cause more vomiting than Jack Daniel's!

 

[Irrelevant]

New food technologies could release 80% of the world's farmland back to nature

Cellular and microbial agriculture can make the same amount of food on a fraction of the land.

theconversation.com

I'd like to read a good essay the morality and ethics behind switching to a synthetic diet. I argued at lunch the other day that it is more morally just to eat meat, to recognize and acknowledge that my life also causes death. And that such an acknowledgement prevents gluttony. However, the real world flaws in that rational was quickly pointed out. I struggled to provide a logical coherent argument that was more than because it's natural. Which is not really much of an argument at all.