help him or leave him

[mixedbag]

No, I've never helped him out of jail before.Whenever he needed money in the past, he would call for his job back or some temp. work.He was actually calling and texting me for work before this happened.
John, I do agree with you totally,and thats why I let him go a month ago when he couldn't show me it was paid.I went thru this with another helper last year and paid his $600 before he was locked up.He actually blamed me for his lack of money each week while he was paying me back;unreal

 

[Gunner46]

I'll put it this way. In 11 years I have Never missed 1 child support payment, even when I was unemployed and could have used the money for my own bills. She was re-married and they were doing just fine, Thank You, but that boy was My Son....I showed up to work when I was sick as hell, when I was hungover as Hell, bad weather, whatever... but I showed up, On Time. Why? Cuz I had a son to support.

Let him sit in the pokey. He had plenty of notce before a deputy showed up, he chose it ignore it,or thought it wouldn't happen to Him. Well, it did, and He alone is responsible for it.

AFTER he gets out, make him convince you why he deserves another chance. If you don'tt, you'll be facing the same situation again, and with someone other than him..............

 

[idnative1948]

I'll put it this way. In 11 years I have Never missed 1 child support payment, even when I was unemployed and could have used the money for my own bills. She was re-married and they were doing just fine, Thank You, but that boy was My Son....I showed up to work when I was sick as hell, when I was hungover as Hell, bad weather, whatever... but I showed up, On Time. Why? Cuz I had a son to support.

Let him sit in the pokey. He had plenty of notce before a deputy showed up, he chose it ignore it,or thought it wouldn't happen to Him. Well, it did, and He alone is responsible for it.

AFTER he gets out, make him convince you why he deserves another chance. If you don'tt, you'll be facing the same situation again, and with someone other than him..............

You sir are a stand up guy in my book as far as I am concerned. JMHO from the old school.. As dad always told brother and I, "Son, you made your bed so you have to sleep in it."

 

[mixedbag]

I agree, theres no reason you shouldn't support your kids.The friend side of me says to get him out of there.I stopped and talked with his Mom yesterday after work.I told her I'd be done with him if I helped and he proved me wrong.She agreed I should let him sit a little while first to think about things;tough love.He's been in there for almost 2 weeks now.It took him a week to get the nerve to call me.I'll probably let him go another 2weeks and then pull him out.
This way, I helped a friend and he's had time to learn his mistakes.from there on out, I'll be taking his child support out of his pay for him

 

[MattK]

mixedbag- I'm not sure all the laws/ agreeements about taking child support from someone's pay but I do know that messing with a paycheck before someone receives it can be dangerous territory. All your intentions are great and I applaud you for the thinking but there are some individuals that will "bite the hand that feeds them". I would have a long detailed paper trail if it were me (notarized with duplicate copies).

 

[Southwind]

I would leave him. You have already created a pattern where he knows he will be bailed out. They are real good at repentance and then falling back into the same cycle again and again. You can't save him, he has got to save himself. And yes, I am speaking from learning this the hard way.