France Terror-Alert Status

[whitedeer]

AP and UPI reported that the French Government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "run" to "hide." The only two higher levels in France are "surrender" and "collaborate."
The change was precipitated by a recent fire which destroyed one of France's white flag factories, disabling their military. Both soldiers were sent home until further notice.

 

[TTLS]

Speaking of Frogs, here's a couple more.......

UNIFORMS
A long time ago, Britain and France were at war.

During one battle, the French captured an English major. Taking the major to their headquarters, the French general began to question him.

The French general asked, "Why do you English officers all wear red coats? Don't you know the red material makes you easier targets for us to shoot?"

In his bland English way, the major informed the general that the reason English officers wear red coats is so that if they are shot, the blood won't show and the men they are leading won't panic.

And that is why from that day to now all French officers
wear brown pants.

 

[TTLS]

Press Release:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE - RE: FRENCH'S MUSTARD
We at the French's Company wish to put an end to statements that our product is manufactured in France.

There is no relationship, nor has there ever been a relationship, between our mustard and the country of France. Indeed, our mustard is manufactured in Rochester, NY. The only thing we have in common is that we are both yellow".

 

[TTLS]

Five Surgeons

Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.

The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table,
because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."

The second responds, "Yeah, but you should try electricians. Everything
inside them is color-coded."

The third surgeon says, "No, I really think librarians are the best;
everything inside them is in alphabetical order."

The fourth surgeon chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers. They
always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end and when the
job takes longer than you said it would."

But the fifth surgeon, Dr. Morris Fishbein, shuts them all up when he
observes: "The French are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no
heart, no balls and no spine. Plus the head and ass are interchangeable."