idnative1948
Well-known member
This was sent to me by a friend. This nut case is actually her brother....
My stomach still hurts. Un F...... believable!
When it comes to sleep, I tend to be an "early to bed and early to rise" type of person. When 9pm comes around, I'm usually heading to bed. However, my wife on the other had has just the opposite thoughts on sleep. I call her type of sleeping habits, "late to bed and never to rise". Last night was no exception to my nightly sleep rhythms. At 9pm, I left my wife in the living room watching her favorite TV series and I went off to bed. Now, I need to tell you a little bit of additional information at this point, but I need to do so without offending any of the young readers in my audience. So, allow me to say this portion of the story in Spanish . . . While in bed, I tend to sleep in the "El, Buff-O". If, you know what I mean! So I'm in bed, the lights are off and I'd just about to doze off when a catch this glimpse of something out the bedroom window. The light was nearly gone and darkness had nearly consumed the mountain, except for these pale tan shadows passing by the window??? It took a few seconds to realize . . . Those are not shadows! ELK! "Elk" I scream and leap from the bed!! I run down the hall and into the living room, "Where's my bugle? Where's my cow call?" Now, most wives, having just seen their husband streak down the hall and screaming for a Elk call . . . MIGHT have good reason to call a doctor or dial 911. Not my loving wife! Without taking her eyes off the TV, she just pointed to the hutch by the front door and continued watching her show. I think I might have felt a tinge of annoyance, as I interrupted the CSI investigation of yet another dead body. By the way, did you ever wonder how the characters are able to find a new dead body EVERY single week? Weird! But I digress. I grab the cow call and run for the back door. And, with all my stories here is where I interject just a tidbit of safety into the story! Should you ever do this, DO NOT run around a dark house at night in the "El Buff O" when rounding the corner of a fireplace!! Elk tend to run and not talk back when you cry out . . . El Fruck O MY TOE!!!!
As I limped back to bed, my loving wife never said a thing! The scary part of her show must have been on, because she kept gasping and shaking in fear! Women, what can you say???
My stomach still hurts. Un F...... believable!
When it comes to sleep, I tend to be an "early to bed and early to rise" type of person. When 9pm comes around, I'm usually heading to bed. However, my wife on the other had has just the opposite thoughts on sleep. I call her type of sleeping habits, "late to bed and never to rise". Last night was no exception to my nightly sleep rhythms. At 9pm, I left my wife in the living room watching her favorite TV series and I went off to bed. Now, I need to tell you a little bit of additional information at this point, but I need to do so without offending any of the young readers in my audience. So, allow me to say this portion of the story in Spanish . . . While in bed, I tend to sleep in the "El, Buff-O". If, you know what I mean! So I'm in bed, the lights are off and I'd just about to doze off when a catch this glimpse of something out the bedroom window. The light was nearly gone and darkness had nearly consumed the mountain, except for these pale tan shadows passing by the window??? It took a few seconds to realize . . . Those are not shadows! ELK! "Elk" I scream and leap from the bed!! I run down the hall and into the living room, "Where's my bugle? Where's my cow call?" Now, most wives, having just seen their husband streak down the hall and screaming for a Elk call . . . MIGHT have good reason to call a doctor or dial 911. Not my loving wife! Without taking her eyes off the TV, she just pointed to the hutch by the front door and continued watching her show. I think I might have felt a tinge of annoyance, as I interrupted the CSI investigation of yet another dead body. By the way, did you ever wonder how the characters are able to find a new dead body EVERY single week? Weird! But I digress. I grab the cow call and run for the back door. And, with all my stories here is where I interject just a tidbit of safety into the story! Should you ever do this, DO NOT run around a dark house at night in the "El Buff O" when rounding the corner of a fireplace!! Elk tend to run and not talk back when you cry out . . . El Fruck O MY TOE!!!!
As I limped back to bed, my loving wife never said a thing! The scary part of her show must have been on, because she kept gasping and shaking in fear! Women, what can you say???
