Dysfunctional Hallmark Cards

Calif. Hunter

Active member
Joined
Dec 13, 2000
Messages
5,189
Location
Apple Valley, CA, USA
The Dysfunctional Section of a Hallmark Store...

1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that
you've come into my life...


Inside card) - I've changed my mind.



2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life...


(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you.



3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....


(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for me.



4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go....


(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need
it again.

5. Someday I hope to marry...


(Inside card) - Someone other than you.



6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....


(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!



7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me...


(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.



8. We've been friends for a very long time...


(Inside card) - What do you say we stop?



9. I'm so miserable without you...


(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.



10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy....


(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was?



11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was
only one life jacket...


(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of
you often.



12. Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday...


(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.



13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!


(Available only in Idaho, Alabama, Mississippi, and Arkansas)



14. Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but
wonder...


(Inside card) - What was I thinking?



15. Congratulations on your wedding day!...


(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband.
 

chas031

New member
Joined
Jan 1, 2004
Messages
326
Location
palmer, MA
I have sent my ex MANY over the years but my favorite is:

I miss you, I miss you, I miss you......

(inside)Please hold still, I'm low on ammo!!

Chas
 

old-boss-hen

New member
Joined
Apr 15, 2004
Messages
150
Location
Missouri
Those are actually some pretty good cards. I didn't know Hallmark made that kind. Hmmmmmm gives me something to think about when it comes to the ex hubby. Hehehe. And some other people I wish I didn't know. LMAO
:D
 

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