Who’s Fault question

Yep, the only people I can think of that I know who thought it was a good idea had never been married or in a relationship. Or just complete a*holes that treated women like objects instead of a partner.
Or folks who see marriage as an exchange of social, familial and community duties/commitments rather than as a "soulmate" Hollywood romance. Pretty much was the case for the whole world until the 1850s and is still the case for a majority of cultures out there. Given the mess we have made in the US over the last 75 years, hard to see who is the bigger fool.

Don't get me wrong, I love my wife and wouldn't be happy with a logistical partnership - but I am also a creature of my modern protestant monogamous culture so not sure I can be fully objective. I am reading a book that incidentally quoted a 100+ year old Vietnamese woman when asked about love marriages vs traditional duty based marriages in her culture, "In my many years I have seen both - and love based marriages prove very fragile and don't in the end seem to provide consistently more happiness than the traditional way - I just haven't see the upside of the change in the lives of my daughters and granddaughters." An interesting alternate world view.
 

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