Science has determined the worlds funniest joke( actually hunting related)

[Bigjay73]

This is the World's Funniest Joke According to Science and We Were Not Ready - News18

The funniest joke in the world was found through a study conducted among 1.5 million participants over the course of a year.

www.news18.com

 

[rjthehunter]

Here it is for those who don't want to scroll through a web page!

The joke goes: “Two hunters from New Jersey are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed over. The other guy whips out his phone and calls emergency service. He gasps: ‘I think my friend is dead! What should I do?’ The operator says: “Calm down, I can help. First, make sure he’s dead.’ There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: ‘OK, now what?'"

 

[ImBillT]

Heard it before. Liked it.

In a survey of 1.5 million people, each joke was told only 187-188 times. Seems a little weak to me. Gotta follow the “science” though.

Honestly, I’ve forgotten most of my statistics class, but I’m fairly certain that unless the other 39,999 jokes weren’t very funny at all, the 95% confidence interval on which joke was the funniest was probably VERY broad. My guess is that a data scientist did not look at the numbers.

 

[BigHornRam]

I don't know. I think the one where a rattle snake bites the guy's pee pee while taking a wiz is funnier.

 

[brockel]

Thought Montana fwp would top the list as funniest joke. Guess not

 

[rwc101]

Fake news.

Ernest Scribbler, a British manufacturer or jokes, wrote the funniest joke in the world. A joke that is so funny that anyone who reads or hears it promptly dies of laughter. The British Army became interested in the military potential of the killer joke and translated it into German with each translator working on only one word of the joke for their own safety (one translator saw two words of the joke and had to be hospitalised for several weeks).

The German version is described as being "over 80,000 times as powerful as Britain's great pre-war joke" and is successfully used against the Germans in the Ardennes on July 8, 1944. The British joke is said to have been laid to rest when "peace broke out" at the end of the war, and countries agree to a joke warfare ban at the Geneva Convention. In 1950, the last copy of the joke is sealed under a monument in the Berkshire countryside, bearing the inscription "To the Unknown Joke".

 

[Tiredofthebickering]

I read somewhere that this was the funniest joke at one point:

The funniest joke

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump. I ran over and said: "Stop. Don't do it."

"Why shouldn't I?" he asked.

"Well, there's so much to live for!"

"Like what?"

"Are you religious?"

He said: "Yes."

I said: "Me too. Are you Christian or Buddhist?"

"Christian."

"Me too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

"Protestant."

"Me too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

"Baptist."

"Wow. Me too. Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"

"Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

"Reformed Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?"

He said: "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915."

I said: "Die, heretic scum," and pushed him off.

 

[noharleyyet]

...then the bear asked the squirrel if he had trouble with feces sticking to his fur.

The rest is history...not science.

 

[gouch]

I don't know. That joke is pretty funny but when I was in high school waiting for my chemistry teacher to enter the classroom one morning, a friend told some of us guys a joke. I am not going to repeat that joke here in mixed company, but I couldn't Controle my laughter for the next 10 minutes. When the teacher asked me what was so funny, I couldn't answer for the same reason I can't repeat the joke here. So, I was asked to leave class.

 

[morley.tyler]

Obviously, Dr. Wiseman has never heard of The Aristocrats...

 

[RobertD]

...then the bear asked the squirrel if he had trouble with feces sticking to his fur.

The rest is history...not science.

From the great historian Eddie Murphy no less

 

[Tiredofthebickering]

I read somewhere that this was the funniest joke at one point:

The funniest joke

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump. I ran over and said: "Stop. Don't do it."

"Why shouldn't I?" he asked.

"Well, there's so much to live for!"

"Like what?"

"Are you religious?"

He said: "Yes."

I said: "Me too. Are you Christian or Buddhist?"

"Christian."

"Me too. Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

"Protestant."

"Me too. Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

"Baptist."

"Wow. Me too. Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"

"Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

"Reformed Baptist Church of God."

"Me too. Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?"

He said: "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915."

I said: "Die, heretic scum," and pushed him off.

Finally remembered where I first saw a version of this one: https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Emo_Philips