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Doctors at the CDC have released a statement this month disclosing a new disease that has already infected over half of the United States and is anticipated to continue to spread. The disease itself affects the cells of a person’s entire body then goes dormant (most dangerous stage). The disease ravages the body and leaves serious side effects.*
Symptoms include:
• Severe pain of the scalp from pulling your own hair while viewing our President pander to Muslim terrorists.*
• Uncontrollable heartburn at 8:00 PM during the O’Reilly factor.*
• Loose bowels from swallowing the fact we elected Obama twice.
• Extreme hunger due to vomiting from nightly seeing Muslims murdering innocent people.*
• Bleeding from the eyes. This is not Ebola. It is your eyes reacting to accidentally flipping to a channel that shows Al Sharpton as a legitimate news show host.*
• Since the disease consumes the entire body, every infected person is then identified as the disease itself.*
The official designation for “post Islamo-terrorist stress trauma with apologetic war fatigue” is PIST-AWF. If you feel you are PIST-AWF, please notify your local election board immediately and place your name on the list for a cure.*
It is expected the cure will be available in November of 2016 and will be offered by a credible conservative candidate.
