Opportunity of a lifetime

Elkhunter

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Joined
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Jackson, Wyoming
OK everyone. Here is the opportunity of your lifetime. An opportunity to get a one of a kind trophy. A trophy which will make you the talk of the town. A trophy that you will not likely see on anyone else's wall. Are you interested?
Just send me $5000 to book this hunt now. There will only be a select few that will be able to go on this hunt and the slots will fill up fast. So don't hesitate. Send me your $5000 now to hold your spot for this once in a lifetime hunt.
For $5000 this is what you will get. Once you arrive at my house, transportation not included, you will be set up with comfortable accommodations, or a sleeping bag, and a hearty meal. We will then travel in a mini van to our hunting destination, which I can not disclose, blind folded for the secrecy of the area to be hunted. You will then spend a week in the comforts of a tent and sleeping bag and have the best eats that money can by in a can.
This hunt is limited to the first 20 hunters to send me $5000. I am forced to limit the hunt to 20 because that is all I can squeeze into the mini van.
We will be hunting what several have sought out throughout the years but none have gotten. We will be hunting Bigfoot. I have new knowledge of where they are so send your $5000 now to book your once in a lifetime hunt.
 
Checks in the mail... would tha hearty meal be beans? what about entertainment, weekend warriors princess? or would she limit the minivan capacity to much?
Delw
 
Beans are only a part of the hearty meal. You will also be served fresh CheeezeWhiz and Jelly sandwiches. Hot Dogs on a stick over an open fire also included. Marshmallows will be available for an extra charge or you may bring your own. As far as the entertainment goes, I will be making videos of you and your hunt for Bigfoot. That should proove to be very entertaing for many years to come. Of course the videos will be an extra charge should you wish to purchase them for a small fee of $250.
 
WOW ELKY,you would do all that for us :D
I think Steve and I will both go ,I have always wanted to hunt from a mini van,can you save the front seat for me.
P.S.Is the booster seat included in the price?
I have heard that while in bigfoot country you should NEVER leave your empty bean cans laying around,Hmmmmmm I wonder if they smell like moosie.
 
WOWZERS!!!!!!! I wanna goooooooo hrow some nacho cheese flavored spray cheese and worthless nut in a pink dress doing a belly dance and I'm there.
Chris
 
I talked it over with the wife.. I find that to BE a good deal.. But Moosie being a BArgin Hunter wants a Better deal.... If I bring a Friend could we get 2 for $9,200 ?~?~ I know you would be loosing $800 but If all the slots aren't already filled I might be interested.....

Also, What Weapon do You Suggest ?~?~ I have a Over and Under Watercannon or a Red RIDER B.B. GUN...... I could break out the Winzer 4mm Wrist rocket but don't know if that is Too much Power for the Situation since I haven't hunted that Species Successfully before.....

Please Let me know more on the Dates and the Availibility :D :D

PS,..... Do you take "RUBBER" Checks ?~?~?~
 
The date for this hunt will be the first week of April.
Del, the entertainment is going to be a real surprise and we can discuss the beans.
Deb thew booster seat I will include just for you.
Chris, if Nut decides to go, I will throw in a new pink dress for him, but the nacho cheeze you will have to supply.
Moosie, you are the true bargain hunter and wishes to pay a lower price than members of your very own board. Is this what you really want, for your members to pay more than you? Moosie, Moosie, Moosie, if I do this for you then I would have to do it for everyone and that would result in a net loss of $8000.
The booster seat would no longer be available for Deb and Chris would have to see Nut in regular clothes and the entertainment would no longer be if I were to do this. As much as I would like to do it for you Moosie, I just can't do that. I do think the O/U Watercannon would do you well on this hunt, but being that I will not cut you a deal, I will let you bring your Winzer 4mm Wrist rocket and pans are optional.
 
Guess I missed something. Hmm. Sounds like too many crackers and not enough beer. You folks need some serious help..!!!!!!!!!!!!
Elkhunter, you of all people should know that Bigfoot is alergic to mini vans.
:cool:

<FONT COLOR="#800080" SIZE="1">[ 24 September 2001 07:55: Message edited by: danr55 ]</font>
 
Dan,
I have prepared for that also with a specilty scent lock suit for the mini van. It is a scent lock suit made in a camo pattern sponsored by Carona. ;)
 
So you are going to camo your mini van to look like a six pack of Corona? Better hope that Paul Bunyon doesn't show up. I understand he like Corona. He might mistake one of the hunter for a bottle and try to open it. (Let's hope he remembers that Corona doesn't use twist off caps.)

I guess I'll go.

The Czech's in the male, and the Pole is in the female. (If you remember the old bear joke?) :cool:
 
Ahhhhh How about if you ADD a TROPHIE fee of $8001 And then (If this IS a ligit deal) you would actually be $1 ahead of were you would have been before the hunt........

Ahhhha !!! Moosie always thinking......... (OF HAIRY Yettis ;))

Ole' I got PAns ... I would like to Help in the Kitchen ... I can "SLICE AND DICE" as well ;) :eek: :eek:
 
My check is in the mail, as I just bought what might be the perfect gun for a hunt of the legendary Bigfoot! Went to the Boise gun Show this past weekend and got a real deal on a Hughes Armaments Div. 30mm chain gun! Fires 30mm AP, Incendiary, Depleted Uranium shells, at 5,400 rounds per minute! Belt holds 1,100 rounds. As the late, great hunter/author Robert Ruark said, "Use Enough Gun." Is this enough gun for Bigfoot??

I'm designing a mount right now for the top of the minivan.

L.W.
 
Well it looks like things are shaping up for this safari.
Leanwolf definitly has a plan with his weapon of choice and hopefully a turet mount for the top of the mini van. Guess I will have to get the mini van with a sunroof for Leanwolf. Better hope Paul Bunyan doesn't mistake you for the Carona twist off cap on the mini van though.
We should all be eating well with our Chef Olefish. Got you counted in Olefish. Heck, for $199.95 we will be eating like kings with Mr. slicer dicer.
Moosie you are always thinking. OK, I will let you go for a trophy fee if you wear the new hat you told me about. But you are not allowed in the kitchen, with or without your pan. Take it or leave it. I do this only because this is your site and you are allowing me to advertise this here.
Nut will be our Belly Dancing Entertainment in his new pink dress as requested by Chris and humbly accepted by WN himself.

Here is a brief description of wht you will be hunting for:
STATE: Wyoming
COUNTY: Teton
LOCATION DETAILS: We rented cabins just a small ways from the Grand Canyon. There were lots of cabins for rent. I believe it was at Teton Lake. The mountains with snow were around the lake. A big lodge was just up the road with Moose eating grass in the water behind the lodge.The sighting was a short ways from the cabins headed towards the Grand Canyon. It is the only field with tall green grass and water running through it before the canyon. You drive into timber and climb uphill out of sight of the water just past the water. Not far from cabins up the road.
NEAREST TOWN: Colter Bay Village
NEAREST ROAD: John D. Rockefeller Parkway
OBSERVED: On 6-94 we visited Yellowstone National Park and rented a cabin near Teton Lake. My wife and two sons were with me. We left one morning just after dawn to visit the Grand Canyon of the Yellowstone and see the sights. A short ways up the road I looked to the right and there was a big open flat field with a body of water running through it about nine foot wide. Tall green grass about waist high was growing --it was a beautiful sight. About sixty yards out or so I saw a tall, dark, hairy figure standing close to the water. It stood seven foot or so tall with it's back to us and it's head turned to the left. Its features were massive and very powerful. It was no bear because it heard our van and saw us and took off walking like a man. Its stride was long with it's arms swinging as it walked. My entire family all saw exactly the same thing. The light visibility was quite good. I told all family members to keep their eyes on this creature and to look at nothing else. We finally drove our car through some trees on the road and could no longer see the creature.

ALSO NOTICED: There was no other traffic on the road. It was just a short time after dawn and we seemed to be out and about before anyone else.
OTHER WITNESSES: Counting myself, there were four witnesses.We were in our van headed for the Grand Canyon to do a day of sightseeing.
OTHER STORIES: After returning to my hometown in Washington State, I spoke to a car salesman that use to pack horses in the Yellowstone.He told me there have been lots of sightings in the Yellowstone but he had never seen one.
TIME AND CONDITIONS: The lighting was good and weather clear.
ENVIRONMENT: Open flat field then dipping down to the east running up to line of timber. Also, a channel of water about nine feet wide running through field with waist high green grass.

Road bent uphill and west into timber shortly after sighting occurred.

*****

Follow-up investigation report by BFRO Investigator T.E. Stein:
Witness age 51, elaborated on the creature's physical characteristics during an interview.

The man said as he stared at the creature, he resolved more details. "It had almost human facial features, a big thick neck, a massive skull, big huge arms like a gorilla, a big back, kind of dented in -- I don't know how else to explain it -- massive legs, a big butt. Its head was ****ed to left, and it was staring out across the water, not moving.''

He stressed that the animal could not have been either a bear or fisherman.

"I got a good look at that thing and it was massive. It was no bear. It was no fisherman. This thing was hairy from head to toe. There is absolutely no way that's a fisherman. My first thought was it was a grizzly because of the size and coloration." (The witness said he has bear hunted before.)

"I've seen pictures of sasquatch on TV. This looked like that, although it might have been even bigger around.''

"This thing is real, and it is a big ape. It's got arms on him like a tree trunk.''

*****
Two Men Report Seeing Huge Hairy Creature
Idaho Falls Post-Register


JACKSON - Two men reported seeing a "Big Foot-like creature" on Snow King Mountain near Jackson, Wyo., early Tuesday morning, a spokesman for the Jackson Police Department said.

Robert Goodrich and Glenn Towner, no hometown or ages listed, reported to police that they were chased off Snow King Mountain by a "Big Foot-like creature" 12 feet tall with long, dark hair and arms, which hung almost to the ground.

The two men said that they were going to visit a friend who had built a lean-to on the mountain when they encountered the creature, the spokesman said.

The men told police the creature breathed heavily and made a moaning growl-type noise. They described the creature as having a simian-like face as big as a stop sign and that the creature was hunchbacked, the spokesman said.

Goodrich and Towner told police that they ran when they spotted the creature, and that it followed them. The last time they saw the creature, it was standing under a street light near the Ramada Snow King Inn in Jackson, the spokesman said.

The two men said they were going back Tuesday to take pictures of any possible tracks and to see if they could find their friend.

The police reported that the two men had not been drinking.


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