Did Andy really say this?

[Ithaca 37]

In case you didn't catch it....this is what Andy Rooney had to say about woman over 40.
60 Minutes Correspondent Andy Rooney (CBS)
As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think. If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining
about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting. Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it. Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated. Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart. Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her. Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

 

[Oak]

Nope.

Baltimore Sun writer Susan Reimer contacted Andy Rooney, who told her:

"It just bugs me that anybody would put my name on something I didn't write," said Rooney from his New York office. He's been the object of this kind of hoax before, and another, he said, had just crossed his desk.

I asked him if he shared the author's affection for older women, and he said, "Not particularly."

In October 2005, in his weekly 60 Minutes commentary, Andy Rooney said this of the piece:

A saccharine collection of comments called ‘ANDY ROONEY ON OLDER WOMEN’ has had wide circulation. I was pleased by how many people wrote to say they didn't believe I wrote it.

The true author, Frank Kaiser, had this to say about the misattribution:

I actually wrote it in 2000 but about a year ago [i.e., in 2002], I started seeing it come back to me in e-mails attributed to Andy Rooney. It didn't bother me too much. That's sort of the nature of the Internet. I wrote him and made a joke about it and he called me. You know, he's just as cantankerous on the phone as he is on the air.